The Good Neighbour, Part One

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Later in life, Tobin would share awakening stories with his queer friends, often hearing of gradual, incremental steps, peeking out of the closet, the slowly dawning understanding of why they just weren’t into their hetero boyfriends/girlfriends.But Tobin could point to the precise moment he knew he was gay: Saturday, August 16, 2008, at 3:12 in the afternoon, when he was halfway through his sixteenth year. That was when he looked out his bedroom window at the back of his house into Jimmy Ruiz’s backyard just as the man bent over to pick up a boulder he’d worked loose from the ground.Jimmy Ruiz’s backyard was kitty-corner to Tobin’s. The low fences made it easy for him to look directly down into his yard, and there the man was: six feet tall, massively broad through the shoulders, muscles like a bodybuilder, his back and arms covered in tattoos. His broad back tapered down to a slim waist, and then broadened out again into thighs like tree trunks. He wore only a tight pair of jean shorts, and as he bent over, his taut ass strained at the long-suffering denim until it looked ready to split. If it had, Tobin would later reflect, he probably would have cum in his pants.As it was, he stared in stunned awe at those perfect denim-clad globes, aware suddenly of a tightness in his jeans. He absently pressed the heel of his hand to his crotch and realized that his cock was hard. Without thinking, he unbuckled his belt and unzipped himself, pushing his pants halfway down his thighs, and desperately grabbing his cock, stroking as if by instinct.His breathing ragged, he leaned against the window as Jimmy slowly straightened. The muscles corded and clenched under his tattooed skin as he lifted the boulder above his head and threw it to the side. In that final instant, as Jimmy stood with his arms above his head and each ridged muscle stood out like an anatomist’s drawing, Tobin whimpered. His cock twitched in his hand and exploded, cum spattering on the wall below the window. He leaned against the sill, panting as if he’d run the hundred meter dash, his entire world focused down to Jimmy Ruiz’s ass and an overwhelming, inchoate desire, the like of which he’d never felt before.It was then that he glanced at the clock beside his bed. 3:12pm.He hastily swabbed down the wall and the hardwood below him, but did not pull up his pants. Instead he stood there staring down at his neighbor, and again started stroking his still-hard cock. He came three more times in the next half hour, each time with an intensity he’d never felt. He’d been jerking off for years, discovering like all boys the pleasure of rubbing one out, but there had been little in his mind when he’d done it. He discovered internet porn, aroused by—he thought—big tits and wet pussies, and especially the sight of a woman delivering a noisy and sloppy blowjob.This? This was new. And it wasn’t as though he could really lie to himself about it, that it was the pussy and not the dick in the porn that was turning him on. Nor could he pretend that Jimmy Ruiz was anything resembling effeminate.Well, that’s that, I guess, was the thought that ran through his mind that night after he’d jerked off again to the memory of Jimmy’s ass and muscular back. I like men.The realization came with the usual undercurrent of guilt and anxiety, but not nearly as much as there might have been. It was, after all, 2008; Tobin’s parents were liberal-minded, and were close friends with a lesbian couple who frequently came over for dinner. Two guys from school Haramidere escort had already come out, and had felt comfortable doing so. The fact that he was gay wasn’t distressing to Tobin, just surprising. The thought had honestly never occurred to him. He’d had a girlfriend for two months in grade nine, and had made out with girls at parties, but nothing special. He hadn’t found himself attracted to men before.But now? He lay in bed suffused with desire. And he knew he wouldn’t tell his parents. Not yet, anyway. Not until he’d lost his virginity to Jimmy Ruiz.Because—and here was the thought that exploded through Tobin’s mind like a supernova—Jimmy Ruiz was gay. He’d moved in two years earlier, and at first everyone was nervous: covered in tattoos, he drove a Harley and dressed like a biker. The first murmurs were that he’d bought the old Henderson house, which had gone to wrack and ruin while its elderly owners succumbed slowly to dementia, because he could only afford such a wreck in this otherwise respectable neighbourhood. The neighbourhood held its breath as it waited for the biker parties that would keep them up at night and fill the tidy streets with broken empties and used syringes.But it was not to be. Jimmy Ruiz, it turned out, could have easily afforded any two of the houses in the neighbourhood (he owned his own contracting company), but liked a fixer-upper challenge. Giving the lie to what people assumed, based on his appearance, Jimmy was polite and soft-spoken, given to laughter, friendly, and generous—and gayer than a treefull of monkeys on laughing gas, a fact he was quite open about. In the weird logic of respectable white liberals, a biker was an undesirable, but a gay biker? Put up the Tom of Finland posters!Two years he spent gutting his house and renovating it. Word was that he’d done a beautiful job, though Tobin had never been inside (something he fervently wished to rectify). Now he was moving on to landscaping the backyard, which years of neglect had turned wild. Lying in the dark, fondling his softening cock, Tobin started to formulate a plan.***The kid introduced himself as Tobin, and Jimmy Ruiz recognized him from the house behind and one over from his. He was tall and skinny, but looked as though he had a bit of a swimmer’s build. A fetchingly tousled mop of blond hair, and a shy grin. He’s sixteen, Jimmy, he reminded himself sternly. Plus, you don’t like twinks, remember? That much was true—he didn’t generally go for the boyish types, preferring men of his own build and strength.Still, the kid was undeniably cute. And eager for work.“Anything you need,” he said earnestly. “I can dig or haul dirt or stones, or whatever. Consider me unskilled labour.”“Have you ever done landscaping?”“No, but I’m good at following directions.”Did he just blush a little when he said that? Jimmy smiled a little in spite of himself and scratched the stubble on his jaw. He could use an extra pair of hands, and the kid looked like he’d benefit from getting some callouses.“Deal,” he said, holding out his hand. Tobin grasped it and offered a surprisingly firm handshake. “Come by tomorrow morning at nine, and we’ll get you started digging out that stump.”***For the rest of the summer, and then some afternoons and weekends in September, Tobin dug and hefted, dragged and pounded, piled and fitted the various plants and flagstones and other components of Jimmy’s new backyard, which, as it took shape, quickly became the envy of İkitelli escort bayan the neighbours. Sure enough, the houses on either side and one behind were soon alive with landscaping crews, even as autumn encroached. Sometimes I think I do this just to make sure the other guys get work, Jimmy joked to him one Sunday as they relaxed on folding chairs, sipping cokes.Working with Jimmy, Tobin discovered two things: he still desperately desired him, but he also liked him. Despite his fearsome appearance, with all his muscles, tattoos, and frequently unruly facial hair, Jimmy was a genuinely nice guy, and it was obvious that he’d grown fond of Tobin. Not in the way Tobin wanted, but he told himself to be patient—friendship could turn into something more.After every work session with Jimmy, Tobin would without fail take a hot shower and masturbate while thinking about some mental snapshot he’d taken. Jimmy grunted under the weight of flagstones. Jimmy sitting in a folding chair with his massive thighs stretched out. Jimmy bending over to pick something up.One hot day, again shirtless, Jimmy had stumbled and fallen against Tobin—not knocking him over, but for a brief, ecstatic moment, Tobin had felt his bare skin press against his. Jimmy apologized, and then was worried, interpreting Tobin’s inability to speak for pain or distress. That night he replayed that moment over in his mind, translating the brief feel of Jimmy’s sweaty torso into the imagined sensation of him sliding his naked body over Tobin.Tobin’s fantasies became increasingly elaborate. He started watching gay porn, seeking out videos of macho, muscular men fucking twinks. He fantasized in excruciating detail about what it would be like to suck Jimmy’s cock, imagining how it would feel under his tongue, between his lips, deep in his throat; he stole a particularly thick carrot from the vegetable crisper, stretching his mouth around it, gagging as he pressed it against the back of his throat. He tried again; he nearly puked. And again, and after much effort he was able to slide it past the gag reflex. He made himself cum time and again just thinking about sliding the tip of his tongue around Jimmy’s engorged head.He dreamed of Jimmy fucking him, and the carrot found new use. He wished he could get a proper dildo and proper lube, but knew there was nowhere he could hide them. Vaseline and a carrot would have to do, but oh, how amazing it felt when he fucked himself once he became accustomed to it.The weather cooled, and Jimmy declared the backyard more or less complete. He gave Tobin his last bit of cash for his work, and said that the next summer he’d be redoing the exterior of the house. “And I could use a hand again,” he said.***That winter, Jimmy did not see much of Tobin, and that was by design. A few times the kid knocked on his door, but Jimmy didn’t let him stay long. The pained look on the kid’s face tugged at Jimmy, but two things had become completely clear to him over the past two months: one, Tobin was gay; two, he was smitten with Jimmy.It was honestly charming: Tobin had no idea how obvious he was in the way he looked at him, sneaking glimpses at his body, and his generally soulful puppy dog demeanour. Looking the way he did and built the way he was, Jimmy was no stranger to such crushes from both men and women. And growing up gay in a rough working-class neighbourhood, he became particularly astute at an early age at reading the signs. Sensing whether a guy Escort Çapa was about to punch you or kiss you was a survival skill.And he liked the kid. A lot. Enough that it was difficult at times to push down the stray naughty thought that burbled up in his mind when he let his guard down. One Saturday night, out with some friends, he’d found himself gazing speculatively at a cute blond guy in his early twenties; unbidden, he suddenly thought I bet he’s got a nice, polite, young-dude cock, and he imagined how pleasant it would be to run his lips over it. When the blond guy met his gaze with a smile and looked for a moment as though he was going to walk over, Jimmy frowned ferociously and shook his head. The blond guy turned back to the bar, downcast. Jimmy cursed at himself, knowing that it wasn’t that guy’s cock he’d been fantasizing about.He suddenly felt the overwhelming need to get laid. He started chatting up a surprised but delighted forty-something man with a paunch. As the man later unlocked his apartment door, he turned to Jimmy and whispered, “I want you to use me as your whore. Use me hard and rough.”Not a problem, Jimmy thought, and even took a perverse pleasure in the man’s squeals as he fucked his flabby ass.Forty-something was entirely not the kind of person he’d normally fuck; he didn’t let himself think he was overcompensating, not even as he started to be a little sadistic with how hard and fast he fucked him. Not that the man minded. Nor did he reflect on why he said, “Your place,” when the man asked. He hated going to other men’s places. But on that night and throughout the winter, he never brought a man home. And he never let himself think it was so Tobin wouldn’t see a man leaving his house in the morning.***The winter passed excruciatingly slowly for Tobin. His few attempts to visit Jimmy had been rebuffed, albeit in a friendly manner; he tried not to think that Jimmy no longer liked him, or had only liked him as cheap labour. He fixed his mind on springtime, when he could re-enlist as Jimmy’s boy-Friday for renovating the outside of the house.In the meantime, he took refuge in schoolwork and fantasies. Another boy came out of the closet at school; Jimmy knew that, if he wanted, he could also do so. He also knew it would be an easy matter to get laid among his peers, boys or girls. But no: the idea of having Jimmy Ruiz as his first time had become an idée fixe, almost to the point of obsession.He found more porn vids featuring macho tattooed men fucking blond twinks. He jerked off nightly, thinking of Jimmy’s cock. It changed shape and size nightly. Sometimes it was inhumanly massive, sometimes it was circumcised, sometimes straight, sometimes hooked to one side.He tasted his own cum after he exploded on his belly, savouring the salty bitterness, wondering what Jimmy’s would taste like. He imagined him exploding in his mouth, or the sensation of it trickling down his throat. He imagined Jimmy fucking him, imagined it being gentle—slowly twisting inside him while Jimmy crooned endearments in his ear; he imagined it being cruel—pounding into him painfully while Jimmy rasped, you like that cocksucker? you like the feel of a man’s cock in your boy pussy?It was uncertain which version made him cum harder.***Spring finally came, then early summer, and Tobin tentatively knocked on Jimmy’s door. To his relief, he was warmly welcomed. He pressed a coke into his hand, and sitting at the island in his exquisitely designed kitchen, Jimmy outlined everything he wanted to do to the exterior. Tobin was over the moon until Jimmy said,“Look, I’m really happy to have your help this summer, because there’s a ton of stuff I’ve been contracted to do. So I’m not going to be here a lot of the time. Is that cool with you?”Tobin stuttered, “Well… um, you know I’m not very handy.

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