Tales from Schooner Street: Phil

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I had just pulled into my driveway and gotten out of my car when I heard, “Hey, man. Come here a minute.” It was my neighbor, Zach. We never really spoke unless it was just a wave when we saw each other. We knew each other’s names, but that was it. I walked over to see what he wanted. “Come inside a minute,” he said, and held his door open for me. I walked in and was a bit surprised to see his wife standing in the living room wearing nothing more than a pink, see-through negligee. Her nipples were very visible, but the hem barely covered her pussy.

“Let me ask you something,” he said as he closed the door. “If your wife told you that she wanted you to eat her ass, would you do it?”

I looked from one to the other. “What?”

“My wife and I were about to have sex,” Zach began. “I asked her what she wanted to do first, and she told me that she wanted me to eat her ass. Ain’t that some shit?”

“You want me to mediate this?” I asked as I lightly shrugged my shoulders.

“Naw-naw-naw, man. Ain’t you listening? My wife wants me to eat her ass. What kind of bullshit is that?”

His wife, Lynn, looked humiliated. I felt sorry for her. I said to Zach, “Do you love her?”

“Yeah, I love her, but not enough to do that.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Um, well, because she shits out of that ass is why,” he said rather emphatically.

“Do you go down on her?” I asked him. “You escort bayan seks hikayeleri know, do you eat her pussy?” I looked at her and said, “Sorry, Lynn.”

“Yeah, I eat her pussy,” Zach responded. “I don’t have a problem with that.”

“So, you will put your mouth on a place where she pees and bleeds, but not where she shits, even though I am more than sure she has made sure she is very clean for you?”

“Naw, I ain’t gonna do it,” he said.

“Zach, Lynn is your wife. You should love her enough to do this for her if it’s what she wants,” I told him.

“Would you do it?” he asked me.

“Well, I’ve eaten a woman’s ass before,” I responded. “I don’t see anything wrong with it.”

“That’s not what I asked you,” he said. “I asked you if you’d eat her ass.”

“Dude, that’s your wife,” I reminded him. “I wouldn’t dare—”

“Naw, what I’m saying is, if I gave you permission to eat her ass just to prove to me that not only you do eat ass, but that her ass is worth eating, would you do it?”

I looked back over at Lynn, who looked to be at the point of tears for this humiliation her husband was putting her through. I finally answered, “I … Uh, Yeah. I mean, if you wanted me to do it, and Lynn didn’t mind, then sure, I’d do it.”

“You want him to eat your ass?” Zach asked Lynn.

“I’m sorry,” Lynn said to me. “I’ve never had that done before. I just wanted to know how it felt. If I knew this is what would have come of it, I would never have asked.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Zach said to his wife. “Do you want Phil to eat your ass? Because I’ll let him, if that’s what you really want.”

“W-Would you mind?” she asked me.

I looked at Zach. “Are you sure you want me to do this?”

“Hey, eat it all fucking day, if that’s what you want.”

I looked at Lynn. “In here, or your … Uh … Bedroom?”

“Bedroom,” she said softly, and led me there.

Zach followed. “I gotta see this.”

Lynn crawled onto the bed, then arched her back, causing her ass to jut toward me. I look at Zach and asked one final time, “You’re sure?”

“Knock yourself out, man.”

I spread her ass cheeks and began by slowly licking the rim. As soon as my tongue came into contact with her, she gave a small squeal of delight. I licked and kissed all around the rim, zeroing in on my intended target. Once I reached her asshole, she lurched forward, then immediately back again, then issued a loud “UUUUUHHHHH!” as she came.

I settled nicely onto her asshole and sucked it softly and gently. She began twerking on my tongue, moaning as she had one orgasm after the other. “Turn over,” I told her, and she did.

“You ain’t about to eat her pussy,” Zach said in protest.

“I’m not,” I assured him. I planted my mouth back onto Lynn’s asshole, sucked hard, then began attacking it by flicking my tongue against it as hard and fast as I could.”

“Oooo, shit yeah!” Lynn said. “That’s it, Phil. That’s it, boy. Eat that ass for me. God-damn, that shit feels good.”

“What the fuck you doing to my wife, man?” Zach called out, but I paid him no heed.

Lynn began to throttle her clit as she continued with, “Eat that ass, Phil. Eat it good for Mama.” Then, she screamed out as she sprayed my face with her cum. I moved to pull away, but she grabbed me by my hair and forced my mouth back onto her ass.

“Okay, that’s enough,” Zach said, but when I didn’t immediately stop, he put me in a stranglehold and pulled me from his wife. “I said that was enough.”

“You told him to do it,” Lynn proclaimed.

“I didn’t think you’d act like this,” Zach responded.

“Then you do it,” Lynn told him.

Zach looked at me. “Go ahead, man,” I coached him. “Just eat it like you eat pussy.”

He slowly moved his mouth to Lynn’s ass, but once he had affixed it there, I knew he wouldn’t be coming off it any time soon. Lynn began masturbating again while telling Zach how good his mouth felt on her. Zach said nothing; he just became an ass-eating machine. I decided to take my leave, hoping all the while that, if the time ever came, they would need my help once again when Lynn was ready to take a dick up her ass. A guy could hope, couldn’t he?

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