my-former-life-4

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Subject: My Former Life PRT 4 Gay Adult youth I want to dedicate this story to anyone and everyone who has ever been bullied, discriminated against, abused or murdered for their thoughts, beliefs, race, feelings, who or what they are or were. I wish nothing like that would ever happen. Sadly it continues today. Even from the highest levels. Donate to Nifty. My Former Life Part 4 Ben has been with me now six months and I believe he is a happy boy. I am playing games with him and he likes that. I got a chess board and he has gotten very good. He actually beats me about one in three games. The first time I made a very stupid move and he accused me of letting him win. I assured him I just didn’t see it and he accepted his win and was very pleased he finally beat me. He is getting very strategic in his play now. He has taught Channa and Golda to play as well. I think he just wanted to win more. But, to his dismay Golda takes him about half the time. The girls are becoming very proficient in the violin and doing very well at it. I am very proud of them. Channa and I have grown very close now. A lot of the weekends when Ben isn’t here she will stay with me. Nothing sexual just I adore her. She is very special to me. Golda is very special to me too. But, Channa has my heart. They come over nearly every day and its like they are my little girls now in private. Ben’s art work is selling very well now and he has made a good sum of money.. I haven’t told him how much because I still don’t know what I am going to do with it. I do however have some ideas. However, much to my commandants dismay I did get every child in the camp chocolate bars for the first night of Hanukkah. I explained to him that a happy camp is one that doesn’t escape. He grumbled something about me being soft. I came back with a soft person doesn’t call the Fuhrer by his first name in private. He harrumphed and stormed from my office. He is bitter still he isn’t in Vril and if I have my way he never will be. I bring up Vril because I have a meeting this weekend. Which is tomorrow morning Saturday. Ben has gone with Christian, and Gavriel is staying with me tonight. In the past few months we no longer have sex we make love. As we have grown to love each other very much. But, Ben is my true love. He and Gavriel both know it. But, there is no jealousy between them. Which is good. I wake the next morning and I send Gavriel on his way and pack my staff car with what I will need and head to the castle. Once I arrive I walk into the entry way and I am shocked I see one of Ben’s paintings hanging in the entry way. I see Fat Herman as I call him in my head. Herman Goring if you don’t know who I am talking about. He is talking to Himmler and when they see me they walk towards me smiling. “Ah Hans so good to see you.” Herman says stretching out his hand. I of course shake it. I then shake hands with Heinrich as well. “I see you noticed your painting hanging there. I had no idea you had such talent.” Herman says. “Yes sir it is somersetting I do in my spare time. Which isn’t much anymore that we have expanded the camp.” “I have purchased several of your works recently. They are marvelous.” He says clapping me on the shoulder. I smile and respond. “I am glad you like them.” “Very much. It just goes to show that the Aryan stock is very talented.” “Yes I suppose it does.’ I think if he only knew the real artist was a little Jewish boy who is also my lover. “I hear that you gave the Jewish children candy for their holiday.” Heinrich says. “Yes sir.” Your commandant complained to my office about it. I told him that I looked at it and saw attempted escapes and escapes in your camp are the lowest in the country.” “Yes sir they are.” “I then asked him why he thinks that is.” “What dd he say?” I inquire. “He said its due to his strong hand. I responded I think its because they are more happy with the little gifts you give them that cost very little and it saves more money then it costs. I also saw that the camp didn’t pay for it that you did.” “Yes sir I didn’t think it was proper for the camp to pay for them.” “No it wouldn’t have been. But, from now on you do what you want. I am giving your camp an extra twenty percent monthly stipend. Keep up the good work.” He says smiling at me. “Thank you sir.” I respond. “I just think that your commandant will be happy I am increasing it so he can steal more.” He says. I don’t respond. It is common for Heinrich to know just about everything and he has his suspicions about my commandant but, I wont confirm them. Even though I know they are true. I don’t want him gone as much as I despise him. Because then it would have to be me ordering the death of people. That I don’t want. I see there is a commotion among the generals and others. I am wondering yet kind of knowing what is happening. The door opens and the Fuhrer walks in and all are attention and saluting the little man. Myself included because if I don’t, I will be suspect. He looks around and smiles and salutes back. He walks over to us I assume because Himmler and Goring are with me. But, he walks up to me and shakes my hand. “Herman has given me one of your paintings Hans. I have it hanging above the fireplace at Berghof. Eva just loves it. She actually suggested the spot.” “Which painting do you have Mein Fuhrer?” “It is a lovely mountain scene. It looks a bit like an area I grew up near. I look at it and it brings back happy memories of childhood. I think if I had your talent I would have been a painter instead of fuhrer.” “I have seen some of your works sir. They are very nice.” “You are just being polite. My art hardly compares to yours.” “Thank you sir.” With that he mingles off as he is in high demand as everyone wants to talk with him. I am shocked and a bit worried that Ben’s paintings are in the high commands possession. I don’t really know what to think about it. But, I don’t have time to think for long because the meeting is called to order. We all head to the basement and have our rituals. A seer is brought in afterwards and only the high command is allowed in this session. I decide since it is still early to take a walk. I saw Hitlers dog sitting there and decided to take her with me. This was long before Blondi came around. Hitler always had a dog. He loved and adored animals. Such an odd thing for such a brutal man. Also I always found it odd he was a vegetarian as well. A man so viscous as he wouldn’t eat meat. It always confused me. He was so full of contradictions. I am not standing up for him. He was a horrible cruel man. But, he had a soft side for animals. I take his dog and his guard who is watching her allows me to. I take her lead and we go walking in the woods. She is a young dog maybe two years old. I let her off of her lead and she is racing around the woods happy as can be. I see her chasing a squirrel up a tree. I wonder what she would do with it if she caught it. I walk along and she is always near so I am not worried. We walk for about an hour and I put her lead back on and head back to the castle. I really do enjoy coming to Wewelsburg It is so peaceful here. Its like the outside world doesn’t even exist. Once we get back I hand the dog back over to Hitlers aide and head to my room. I have thought about getting a dog. But, so far have not done so. I don’t have the time to care for it with Ben and my work. Neither of which I have any desire of to neglect to care for an animal. It is getting late and I retire to my room. A few minutes later after I am ready for bed I am reading in a chair that is in the room and I hear a knock on the door. “Come in.” I say. In walks Adolf with his dog by his side. “It is my understanding you took my dog for a walk.” “Yes sir I did. I felt she needed to get out and run and play for a while.” “Yes I think you are right about that.” He says rubbing her head. Her tongue hanging out of her mouth and enjoying the attention. “I just don’t have time to do that for her. Thank you.” “Your welcome sir. I enjoyed it as much as she.” “Very good. Yes very good. Anytime we are here please feel free to take her if you wish. I know she loves the woods. Did she catch anything?” He says with a smile. “No sir, she did not. I wondered what she would have done with it if she did catch something.” “I have often wondered the same thing. I think she is too loud and scares them before she gets near enough to them.” “I am sure you are right.” “Maybe so.” He says and turns to leave. He looks back at me. “Thank you again.” “Your welcome my mein Fuhrer.” I think my god I could kill him nearly any time I am here. But, he never stays. I could have snapped his neck right then. Of course I would have been killed as well then Heinrich would take over and he is even more vicious then this little fool.” It is odd though that he is so kind to animals and thinks so little of human beings. I read a bit more then go to sleep. I have horrible nightmares of them finding out what I have been up to and that Ben is taken from me and killed. I am hanged and I wake choking as the bottom falls out from me. I put my hand to my throat quickly to feel for the rope marks. The dream was so real I was shaking from fear. It is still very early and I decide to leave now instead of wait until daylight. I pack my things and head to my car. Himmler is outside strolling around and sees me. “You are leaving so early?” He asks. “Yes sir. I woke and figured I may as well get back now so I can rest and be fresh for work tomorrow.” “I see.” He says and takes a drag from his cigarette. “Have a safe trip Hans. I do hope you will keep up the good work for us.” “Yes sir I certainly will.” I drive back and its so dark there is no moon out this morning. I nearly miss a turn in the road and veer back onto it. I see I nearly went over a cliff. I slow down as I don’t want to die and leave all the people I am trying to help without any safety net. Because I know that the next person to take my job would most likely not be as kind as myself. Not that I am great mind you. Just compassionate. As the sun is starting to come up I arrive at the gates of the camp. I drive to Ben’s mothers apartment as I want to spend the day with Gavriel. I am enjoying his company. He is a serious boy like I was. That and I am worried about everything and the love making will put it out of my mind at least for a while. I go up the stairs and knock lightly on the door. It opens a crack and Ben’s mother peeks out. She opens in wider once she sees its me and lets me in. “What can I do for you Herr Major?” “I got back early and I would like to spend some time with Gavriel.” “I will get him for you sir.” She says and then goes to the kitchen to wake him. He is dressed and ready quickly and we head down to my car. The little boy who wipes down my hubcaps for me is standing and waiting for me. “Herr Major I wiped off your caps and washed your windshield because it was dirty.” He says smiling. He is a very cute boy and I always give him a treat. I sadly don’t have anything in my pockets today. “I don’t have any treats today. Why don’t you ride with me and Gavriel and I will make you a nice breakfast. Does that sound good to you?” He smiles a big toothless grin as his baby teeth are coming out. I see the start of his permanent teeth coming in on top. Such a cute little guy I think. Both boys climb in and the younger boy gets in the middle to sit next to me. He is right next to me and I can feel his heat against me. I am already worked up and my cock is instantly hard. The problem is that once I got the door shut his odor hit me like a wet towel. It was painfully bad. So bad my eyes started to water from the smell. I rolled down the window as did Gavriel. Once we got to my house I say to the boy. “What is your name young man?” “I’m Adam.” “Well. Adam how old are you.” “I am seven Herr Major.” “A very nice age seven is. Adam I know it isn’t your fault because its so cold right now and you hardly have any heat. I know that you haven’t been able to bathe. So once we get inside I am going to have Gavriel give you a bath. I am going to wash your clothes so they wont smell so bad.” “I’m sorry Herr Major.” He says looking ashamed. I reach down and touch his cheek. “No don’t be sorry Adam I know that if it wasn’t so cold you would wash. I am kind of glad you haven’t because you might catch a terrible cold and get really sick.” Which is true. The apartments though nicer then the dorms had very little heating wood given to them. I have been thinking of having work crews go into the woods and pull out all the felled trees. I think that might be enough to heat them until spring. Which isn’t too much farther. That and there is no hot water in the apartments either. Who wants to take a bath when its less then 0 Celsius and its nearly that in the apartment. Once we go in we all go to the bathroom and Adam and Gavriel strip down as I start a nice warm bath. I think it would be fun for them to have bubbles so I get some soap shavings and put them in the water and the bubbles start to form. I take Adams clothes to the kitchen sink and start to scrub the dirt and stench from them. I think I do a pretty good job as I every now and then hold it up to my nose and smell. Its smells like soap after several attempts instead of dirty boy. I hand them up in the living room over the heat so they will dry. I know it will take some time for it to happen and that’s fine a naked boy in front of me is not a bad thing. I walk into the bathroom and see Gavriel washing Adam from head to toe. He is sparkling clean now. Adam stands up and shows me how clean he is. “I’m clean now Herr Major.” He says and smiles. I see his little cock is rock hard. How can I not notice that. He is only seven though much too young for me to try to have sex with. “Almost.” I say. “Come here let me wash your hair for you.” I have him lean back against the back of the tub and I scrub in some soap into his hair and gently massage his scalp like Ben does for me. He closes his eyes and is completely relaxed. I massage his head for a few minutes then rinse out his hair. He is now sparkling clean from head to toe. “That felt so good Herr Major.” “Yes that’s What Benjamin and Gavriel tell me. When I do it for them too.” “It almost had me sleeping.” He says. “Well if after you eat and are sleepy I will get you a blanket and you can sleep on the couch while your clothes dry.” He just smiles at that. “Come over here Gavriel I know you want me to wash your hair too.” He smiles and Adam stands up his little cock is still hard. Its a pretty little thing about an inch and a half long and nice tight balls. I wouldn’t mind playing with it for a while and let him feel nice. But, he is a bit too young for me. I see Gavriel watching me watch Adams cock and he smiles at me. When he does he reaches up and touches Adams cock and starts to rub it up and down. “Oh.” is all Adam says. Gavriel slides over and takes the spot where Adam just was never letting go of the boys cock. Adam seems to be liking it follows so it wont stop. He is standing in front of Gavriel and I pour some water over Gavriel’s head and then apply some soap and start rubbing it in. Gavriel is still stroking Adams hard pecker and Adam is starting to kind of hump into his hand at the same time. I have to say I am hard as stone watching this happen in front of me. Adam is standing right in front of Gavriel his legs on either side of him and Gavriel pulls him forward by his cock and once he is close enough he pops it in his mouth and starts sucking him. Adam looks down absolutely amazed that someone would do this and that it feels so good. He puts his hands on Gavriel’s cheeks and starts to pump into his mouth that I can see is suctioning his cock. I am just calmly watching and massaging Gavriel’s head. After a short time maybe two minutes maybe a minute longer but, not any more then that Adam lets out a little peep. Actually a succession of peeps. Its very cute and after a minute he pulls his cock out and starts giggling. “It tickles now.” I rinse Gavriel’s head and smile at Adam as he looks down at his cock and touches it, amazed it can make him feel so good. “Gavi can I do that to you?” Adam asks. Gavi I think. They must know each other. It seems awfully familiar if they don’t. But, he did just blow him. So I guess familiar is alright. “Sure sit down here where I am and maybe Herr Major will rub your head while you do it.” He looks at me hoping I will. “Sure Adam. If you want me too.” He sits down and Gavriel stands up in front of him and pops his cock into the boys mouth. My cock is straining at the seams by now as I watch him pump his cock in and out of Adams mouth. It is a sight to be seen for sure. I watch as Gavriel’s three inches slides in and out and I see the moisture on in from Adams saliva. I am rubbing his head with my hands wishing I could get sucked right now. I watch as Adam has his lips tightly wrapped around Gavriel’s cock. Gavriel starts rubbing his little balls and Adam gets the hint and starts doing it for him. I can tell he is close as he pulls it out of Adams mouth. “Come here Adam.” Gavriel says as he pulls him up. He then leans him over the side of the tub with is ass open he sticks his tongue on his rose bud and starts licking. “Oh that feels good.” Adam whispers. I can see Gavriel trying to force his tongue in and is being met with resistance. He finally gets frustrated and slips a finger in and starts hitting Adams little button inside. Adam starts moaning a little and pushing back so Gavriel can hit that little button more. After a few minutes of the hottest thing I have ever witnessed Gavriel stands up behind him and slides his cock in Adams tight little hole. He grabs Adams little hips and starts really pumping into him. Adam is pushing back I am guessing because Gavriel is hitting his little button. I had thought watching them blow each other was hot but, my god this was amazing to see. I cant take it anymore. I stand up and pull out my cock and start to wank it. Gavriel sees this. “Let me suck you Herr Major.” I lean in over the top of Adam and am watching Gavriel’s cock slide in and out of him. Gavriel leans forward a bit and takes me in his mouth. Adam is watching this and smiles at what he sees. I am so hot I am starting to pump into Gavriel’s mouth as he sucks me hard. He puts one hand on my cock and keeps his other on Adams hip and is pumping hard into the boy. Adam starts peeping again and I know he is cumming from this and I feel Gavriel moaning around my cock as he feels Adams hole constrict and pulse around his cock sending him over the edge. I am so close now I pull it out of his mouth step back and spray my cum in Adams face and all over his back and on Gavriel’s chest and stomach. I watch my cum start to drip off of Adams face and he wipes at it not knowing what it is. He looks at it on his finger and rubs it between his fingers and his thumb. He sniffs it and tentatively tastes it. He seems to like it because he licks the rest off his finger and wipes the rest off his cheek and does the same thing. Gavriel has already swiped some off of Adams back and he does something I think odd he wipes it on his cock and starts to rub it in. I look at him with a question in my eyes. “It makes it bigger.” He says. “If you think so.” Adam watches him then he gets some and rubs it on his cock.” “I want it bigger too.” After a moment I rinse the rest of the cum off of them and get them out of the tub giving them both a good spraying. Just this morning I was talking to Heinrich Himmler and now I am making sure I got all the cum off of two boys. What a strange life I lead. I am thinking. “Come on boys lets go have some breakfast now. I worked up a bit of hunger there.” “Yeah.” Adam says. I am sure he was hungry before but, this will help him a bit getting a nice hot meal. I head to the kitchen and start making toast for all of us. I wish I would have gotten Anna when I stopped to get Gavriel. But, she deserves some time off. I was supposed to be at the castle and not return until late. So I told her to spend time with her family. I cut up some potatoes and fry them up, and then fry some eggs. By the time its all done the boys look as if they are starving from the smells. Hell they very well could be. But, I know Gavriel isn’t I send enough food for Ben’s family and now extended family. I pour a glass of milk for all of us and sit the food on the table for us. The boys are just eyeing it. I get the hint and put good sized portions on their plates. I start eating and they do as well. About half way through I look up and ankara otele gelen escort the boys are both done. “Would you like more potatoes?” I ask because I only made two eggs for each of us. “Yes please Herr Major.” Adam says. “No thank you Herr Major. I’m pretty full.” Gavriel says. So I just put the rest on Adams plate. I don’t think he is truly full I think he is just being nice to our “guest”. Adam continues to eat and I finish. He is wiping up the last of the little bits of potato with the last bit of toast. “Adam would you like some more? I can make more if you like.” “No Herr Major. I am so full now I am sleepy.” “Well, that’s a good thing. I’m glad your full.” “Gavriel go get a blanket for Adam so he can nap on the couch please.” He gets up immediately and goes and gets a blanket from my bedroom closet. He then puts it on the couch and spreads it out so its half on bottom and Adam can slip between it and sleep comfortably. Adam is starting to nod off at the table and I pick him up and carry him into the other room. I lay him in the little cocoon and tuck him in. I kiss the top of his head. His eyes flutter open for a second. “Thank you Herr Major.” “Your welcome Adam now sleep for a while little guy.” I sit down in my chair thinking I am going to read but, Gavriel has other plans. He waves for me to follow him into the bedroom. I see he has put some cooking oil on the nightstand. I know what he wants and my cock is at attention immediately when I see the oil. He lays down on the bed and puts a pillow under his butt to poke it up. I quickly undress and liberally put oil on his hole then coat my cock. I line up behind him and slowly slide it in his love canal. I am lost in a daze and am really pounding into him. Gavriel is moaning and groaning telling me to go faster. I cant go faster I think as I’m pounding as fast as I can. I look over and see Adam watching and he is stroking his little hard cock. I smile at him and he smiles back. Just then I feel Gavriel’s ass start to clamp down on my cock. I am looking at Adam and him playing with his cock and when I feel this I go over the edge. I slam my cock hard into Gavriel wishing it was Adam and I release my load watching Adam stroke himself. As I let lose Adam peeps a few times and I see his legs are like jelly and he is having a hard time standing. He puts his other hand on the bed and peeps one last time. Once I get my bearings I look over at Adam again. “Will you do that to me now?” He asks. “No I think you may be too small. But, I am sure Gavriel will be more then happy to again in a few minutes. That’s exactly what happened too. Adam took the same position and Gavriel pounded him just as I had just pounded him. Adam you could see was loving it. I just sat and watched. Two cums in an hour is about all I could handle then. But, it was hot to watch that’s for sure. After they were done we went back to the living room and I checked to see if Adams clothes were dry and they were. So I dressed him carefully making sure to enjoy feeling his soft boy skin as I did. I even gave his little cock a few strokes. He smiled as I did. Once he was dressed he put on his coat and headed back. Gavriel and I stayed the rest of the day together. “So how do you know Adam?” I ask. “He is one of the neighbor boys Mom feeds.” I like that he has taken to calling Ben’s mother mom as have the other boys. “He is a cutie that’s for sure.” “Yeah I have been wanting to do that with him for a while now. I am glad I got the chance. I think he will visit every Sunday now. If that’s OK with you?” “Its fine with me.” “Why didn’t you do it to him?” I think hes a little bit too small for me yet. But, I wanted too.” “He wanted you to.” “I know but, he is too little I am afraid I would hurt him.” “I didn’t.” “Gavriel your cock is a bit smaller then mine.” “Yeah for now.” “Yeah for now.” I agree. After that we played some games and he blew me once more. I sent him home even though I know he wanted to stay the night. But, I just wanted some alone time. Just some time to well wank. Having a good wank is fun sometimes. I don’t get to often anymore. As I always have a lover close by. That night I wanked and thought about sliding my cock in and out of Adams tight little hole. I came hard three times that night. I also came in the morning thinking about him too. But, this time I imagined him sucking me. Maybe in time I think. I get dressed for work as its Monday now. I head out and Anna is singing a happy little song. “Good morning Anna I trust you had a nice time with your family?” “Yes Herr Major. We had great fun. The girls made up some silly game and we played it all weekend. We had such fun.” She says smiling. I sit and have a coffee and some toast. I smoke my now usual about six cigarettes before heading to the office. Ben had gotten me a lighter. He felt I needed one to carry with me now. He had Christian get it for him. I love it. As I sit here so many years later I lean back and open my desk drawer. I pull it out and fiddle it in my hand. The engraving is nearly worn off. But, I know what it says. To H.L. With love. As I hold it the memories of that day sure into my mind like it was yesterday. My god how time flies. It feels like yesterday. I look at my old hands and wonder were it all went. I hope that if there is a maker that when I meet them that they look at me and say I did the best I could. Because I know I tired to always do the best. I put the lighter back in the drawer and close it. Then my mind goes back to that first Monday after Adam first visited. I get to the office and Ben and Christian are already there As I enter my Sergeant stands up at attention. “At ease.” “Herr Major I got a game that Ben just loved to play. I would like to give it to you so you and he can play together.” He says holding out a box. “Thank you Christian that’s very kind of you.” “He wants you to have it because he cant beat me at it.” Ben says giggling. “That’s not true. I won one game.” He says frowning at Ben, It quickly turns into a smile though. “I’m glad you two had fun. How is the baby?” his wife had a little girl about two months ago. I sent gifts of course and Ben simply adores her like she is his sister. “Magda is doing splendidly Herr Major.” He says smiling. I can tell he is a very proud father. “Very good. Do you need anything?” “No Herr Major everything is just fine. Thank you though sir.” “Now if you need anything you let me know.” “I will Herr Major.” To be honest I love the little bundle too. She is the cutest little thing. I have been to see her a few times now. I was afraid. No terrified to hold her the first time she was so tiny I just knew I would break her. Christians wife just laughed at me and put the baby in my arms. It is nice to hold a baby. It is even nicer when they mess their diaper to hand them back. I wouldn’t say Christian and me are close. But, we are closer and we do share things in our lives now. I am certain he knows that Ben is my lover. But, he doesn’t say anything because he can see that Ben truly loves me and I him. He can see it in Bens eyes every time he looks at me. I can see it too. Ben and I go into the office and I get to work. I have started giving Ben little tasks like getting my paperwork in order for me so I can get it done quicker. So that time in the office is less and we can spend more time being together. It actually cut about half an hour off of my work time. He also is teaching Gavriel how to read on Tuesdays and Thursdays. They do that in the corner so it doesn’t disturb anyone. As it turns out Gavriel couldn’t read at all. So I got some lesson books from a local teacher and now Ben is his teacher. He is doing very well. Actually they both are. Now Gavriel is taking books home to read in the evenings and is coming back and telling us what they are about. The week flies by and I decide Sunday to take Ben’s latest paintings to the art dealer. There is a demand for them now. Seems like every time I show up the dealer asks when I will be back with more. I decide to take Ben with me this time. As this weekend Christian has to go to his mothers and of course cant take Ben with him. We load the paintings in the boot and head to town. Ben is in his black suit he loves and his boots now new boots as he grew out of the last pair that are just like mine. I walk in and the art man I had heard rumors he has hidden some Jews and gotten them to Switzerland to freedom. I don’t now if its true or not. Rumors are dangerous sometimes. I walk in with an arm load of paintings and Ben follows behind with a few as well. I sit them down and Ben goes to get the last few. All together its ten paintings. “I am so glad to see you Herr Major. I am glad to say that I only accept offers of fifteen hundred Reich marks per painting. Some I get more for. Let me get you your money from the last batch.” He says. Ben looks at me surprised. He had no idea they were selling for so much. The art dealer comes back in and he counts out twelve thousand Reich Marks for me. “I am glad we do it this way now that I pay you after they sell. As it was hard to keep track of it the other way.” “Either way is fine with me.” “Guess who bought a few of your paintings.” He says smiling. “Herman Goring.” I say. He looks at me surprised I knew. “I saw him last weekend. He gave one to the Fuhrer and it hangs above the mantle at Berghof. He told me himself.” “You talked to the Fuhrer?” He asks surprised and maybe impressed. I cant tell. “Yes I have on many occasions. I took his dog for a walk last weekend and he thanked me personally.” I say not bragging just making conversation. “Your joking.” “No sir. You want to hear the kicker.” I have thought about this for a long time how to do this. Now seems like the time. I make him wait until he asks. “What is it?” “I don’t paint these he does.” I say and point to Ben. “Bah. Your pulling my leg.” I look him dead in the eye. “No and I want to get him out of Germany with some others. Do you know people who can help?” “I would be killed if I did.” “I would be killed if they found out a Jewish boys painting hangs above the Fuhrers mantle too.” He looks at me and can tell I am serious. “I may be able to help. Let me think about it a little while.” I take his hand in mine and hold it to my heart. “Please think hard and then say yes. I know I am a Gestapo Major and I am known to be a tough man. But, in my heart I am not. Please help me to free some people I truly care about.” He looks into my eyes and knows I am telling the truth. “How many?” “Fourteen.” “Fourteen are you mad? Maybe we can do five.” “No at a minimum it must be twelve.” He leans back against his counter and looks at me then at Ben. “Twelve is a lot. Its not unheard of but. Its still a lot. Can we do it piece mail?” “No because they are all close to me. If one family is gone the other will be held accountable.” “So they are all close to you?” I nod my head. “You may be killed if you don’t go with them.” I just nod my head. “They are worth your life to you.” Again I nod. Ben isn’t saying a word he is just watching us talk. “I’m not saying I can do it. I will have to talk to some people. It will be a thousand Reich marks per person. It is for bribes not for profit.” I look at the money on the counter. “I make no promises and if I cant I will give this back.” He says putting the money in his pocket. “I will come in next Saturday and see what your answer is. I am sure that I will have some paintings for you then as well. Sadly if this works I wont have more for you.” I say putting my hand on the counter. He puts his hand over mine and looks me in the eye. “Some things are more important then money.” “Yes. Yes Indeed.” I turn to walk out and look back at the art dealer. I put my hand on Ben’s shoulder and we walk out. “Saturday then?” He nods. I know he watches Ben and myself leave. Once we are in the car Ben looks at me, like he has never seen me before. “That’s why you had me paint isn’t it?” “No I had you paint because you love to do it.” “But, to get money to help me escape was part of the plan all along?” “I wish I was so clever as to think of that. But, no I had no idea what I was going to do with the money. I know I wanted it to go to you somehow. Now we know how it will.” “I cant let you do it Hans.” “I don’t see why not.” “Because it could cost you your life.” “Have you seen the men in camp lately with pink triangles on their uniforms?” “Yes I don’t know what it means.” “Those are men who are just like me. They have been convicted of having sex with either other men or children. They are here because they are deviants. I am a Major. If I am found out I wont be so lucky to have a triangle. I will get a firing squad or hanged. So my life is in peril every day. It is better that I risk it to give your family and Anna’s freedom.” He looks at me and then down at his feet. “What will I do without you?” “You my young friend can be a boy again.” I say and smile at him while I reach over and touch his leg. He puts his hand on mine and doesn’t say anything the rest of the way home. I go to his mothers building and tell him to have her come to my house but, not to say anything to anyone as to why. Walls have ears you know. I drive back to my little house and am giddy and sad in the same instance. Its odd when that happens but, it does occur. I walk in sit down and light a cigarette. A few minutes later Ben and his mother return. “Herr Major what can I do for you?” “Please sit down. Benjamin go and get Anna please and tell Channa and Golda to go home.” “Yes sir.” I hear the back door close and the girls are gone Anna comes back in with Ben. “Anna please sit down I have some news to tell you both. Now I don’t know when or how or even if this will happen. But, I have put a plan into motion today.” I snuff out my cigarette and light another. “I have asked a man to smuggle your families out of the country.” Anna gasps and puts her hand over her mouth. Ben’s mother looks at me with wide eyes. “Do not tell anyone even your husband Anna. Do you understand? If anyone gets wind of this I will be killed without a trial. You will all be killed too more likely then not. But,….” I say and take a deep drag on my cigarette.” Is this a risk you are willing to take.” I say as I exhale a huge plume of blue smoke. Neither cant speak they just nod yes. I look at Ben’s mother. “Do you think your Aunt will sponsor you to go to America?” “It is my sister and yes.” “I am going to create some fake documents and the boys will all be your sons according to the paperwork. You will be responsible for the for the rest of their lives. Is that acceptable to you?” “Yes I love them dearly. All of them.” She responds. I look at Anna and before I ask she says. “Yes they are like my own. But, poor Channa will miss you greatly. So will I.” She says. “I will miss all of you too. But, it is for the best.” “But Hans you didn’t tell them that if we escape you may be shot anyway.’ Ben says. “One life for twelve seems a fair trade.” I say and take the last drag of my cigarette then snuff it out. “But, we live nicely here.” Anna says. “We have plenty to eat and we have plenty of everything.” “Yes everything but, your freedom. Now this may not work and you may be caught. If you are you will likely be killed for escaping. But, your paperwork will fool the Fuhrer himself. So long as they don’t strip the boys.” At this point I get up and go to my room and return with a mound of cash. “This is what Ben has made from is paintings. It will all go with you. So you can have a nice life after this. It is the least I can do.” Ben’s mother looks at it and then at me. “How much is it costing to get us out of the country?” “One thousand each. It is already paid.” “How much is there?” “A bit more then half a million.” “We wont take it all.” She says. “If it goes well then use it to help others to either escape or to make sure their lives are a bit less hungry.” She says. “Well, that is your choice. I have an idea to exchange the money and buy diamonds and jewels. So that way when you get to where you are going getting cash will be easier then trying to exchange the Reich marks.” “But, how will we carry them?” She asks. “You wont carry then per se. I figure each of you will have to eat a good amount of them before you go. That way each person will have plenty if the others are caught.” “Or if a few are caught then the others will have plenty. Of course you will have to have some cash to get things on the journey I am sure. So you will have to have some of it as well. But, the majority will be in gemstones.” `You have thought about this a lot haven’t you?” “Yes I have.” “Good then what you do is use all the money to buy gems so if they ask you about them you will have a lot to show them. You can attribute it to your art work sales.” “That a good idea I hadn’t thought of that. Because if I buy a ton of gems and then you all disappear and I have nothing to show I will be shot without a trial for sure.” “Yes.” she says and nods. “I will find out next Saturday if its a go or not. I just wanted to make sure you were indeed interested.” I light another cigarette and inhale deeply. “Herr Major you smoke too much?” Anna says. “It doesn’t matter now. The only thing that does is you getting free. Now remember No one else is to know. I mean NO ONE. The walls have ears ere as yo know.” They all nod they do indeed know. “Alright I believe we are done here then. Unless you ladies have anything to add.” “Not at this time Herr Major.” Anna says. “No Herr Major.” “So its settled. I just hope it works.” “When will it happen?” Ben asks. “You know as well as I do. It all depends on the underground at this point. But, I hope its soon. I don’t want to keep you here any longer then I have to. I wanted to try and get the boys next door Adam and his brother. But, the man said twelve is pushing it and fourteen isn’t going to happen.” “It would be nice if they can go. I’ve grown rather fond of them.” Ben’s mother says. “Maybe next time if this time works.” I say. Anna heads back to the kitchen. Ben’s mother heads back to her apartment. Ben and I sit there. I chain smoke and read. Ben just reads. I am not doing well at reading as I have read the same paragraph multiple times and it may as well be in Spanish because I’m getting as much from it as I would a language I don’t know. Finally I put the book down and I look at Ben. He looks up from his book. “Hans?” “Yes?” “What if I don’t want to go?” “Then you aren’t as smart as I know you are.” “I don’t want you to risk your life for me.” “I think that’s my choice not yours. Besides if your family goes wouldn’t you want to be with them?” “Yes.” “So that’s enough of that foolishness then. If we can arrange it your gong to America.” “But, I don’t speak English.” “Then I guess you will learn then.” “Can you teach me some?” “I’m not fluent. But, I can try.” “Some is better then none I suppose.” “Probably. At least you will have a head start when you get there.” “Do you really think we can make it all the way there? Its really far isn’t it?” “Yes its very far.” “How will we get there?” “I imagine by a boat from Sweden or maybe England.” “How long will it take?” “The boat trip?” “Yes.” “I don’t know. Maybe a couple weeks.” “What do you do on a boat?” “I really don’t know. I’ve never been on one.” “Do you think it will be scary?” “On the boat no. I think it will be a fun adventure for you.” “So you think it will be scary when we escape?” “Yes I’m sure it will be scary for all of us. I wish I could figure out a way for you to let me know when you get to America. But, if I get a letter from you then I will be arrested.” “We can figure out something maybe.” “Maybe. I just know I want you to have a happy life. Not living in a prison camp. Not having to be afraid or treated badly because your Jewish. Its all so ridiculously stupid.” He sits and thinks for a while. Anna comes out and tells us dinner is ready. I am eating again pretty regular. But, my eating is very sporadic. My smoking however isn’t. I am up to four packs a day now. I have started coughing a lot more now. Before it was infrequent. Now its nearly constant. I know I should cut back but, at this point I just don’t care. Whats the point of being healthy when you could die any day. Some would say because maybe you wont. My response is maybe I will. I am treading very dangerous waters now and it is only going to get worse. We head in to the kitchen and she made a nice roast and her amazing rolls. I swear if there is a god he öveçler escort sent them down from the heavens. She always makes tons of them because she knows Ben and I love them. We each eat about six of them with dinner and then snack on them later. “So you made these before or after our talk?” I ask. “Before silly. They take all day.” “Well, thank you for them.” “Yes Anna thank you.” Ben says around part of one he is eating. “Ben don’t speak with your mouth full.” I admonish him. “Sorry.” He says around another bite. I know he is getting my goat this time and I just rub his head and go back to buttering one of the tastes of heaven. We have our dinner and Anna heads home. After dinner I have several cigarettes at the table. Then I head to the living room where Ben is already listening to the radio. “Ben will you do me a favor?” “Anything you want.” He says and means it. “I don’t know how long you will be here for now. Will you play me a song?” He doesn’t say a word and goes to get his violin. He comes back in and starts to play. I close my eyes and the tears stream down my face. I am so sad and happy right now. I love him so much I want him to have every chance to have the best life possible. He stops playing mid song. “Is something wrong?” “No just keep playing.” He does he plays for an hour and I try to remember every note as he plays. I wont have him around me much longer I think. I want to enjoy every second I have with him. I am so worried he will be caught or hurt, or worse yet killed. I sit and listen with my eyes closed and enjoy the sounds he is creating for me. Just for me no one else. I feel so special to have known and loved him for the time I have. I really don’t want it to end. But, I must get him out before anything happens to him. I just must. After an hour I hear the clock chime seven. “Ben your favorite show is about to start.” “I can keep playing if you want.” “No I want you to listen to your program. I know you enjoy it.” “OK.” He says not happy but, not sad either. I think he is thinking the same as me. That his freedom has the price of our love. Not that I or he will stop loving each other. Just that we will no longer be able to be together. I know he is probably excited about the prospect of going to America. I would be too. But, I am thinking he doesn’t want to show it and upset me. We listen to the program and the one that follows it. Then its time for a bath then bed. We take our bath and I make love to him slowly in the tub. I enjoy every feeling every touch trying to memorize it. I don’t want one second one millisecond to be forgotten for all of eternity. I think he is feeling the same way because he has his eyes closed and it seems as if he is concentrating on his feelings as we make love. Once we get out we dry and have another roll OK three then go to bed. I hug him tighter then usual and he holds me tighter too. We don’t know if it will happen. But, we are preparing just in case. I wake up several times in the night from nightmares that they are caught. Every time I am so scared I am shaking. I have a cigarette to calm my nerves. I must have smoke half a pack as I “slept”. Each time Ben would ask me if I was OK. I always said yes I was just having a hard time sleeping. Pat him on his cute little butt and tell him to go back to sleep. He would but, I felt bad I am interrupting his sleep. I wake up for the last time at around six am. A bit early for me. But, I just cant take the dreams anymore. I go to the kitchen and Anna is already here. “I just made coffee Herr Major. Would you like some toast?” “Yes please.” “Herr Major do you think this is going to work?” “I’m going to do my best to makes sure it does. But, there are no guarantees it will. If you don’t want to try I will understand.” “No I would like to try.” “I would too.” She makes me some toast and I sit and drink my coffee and eat the toast not tasting any of it. After I smoke a few cigarettes and then go to get dressed. I put on my uniform and I walk back out to the kitchen. “Anna please let Ben sleep. I slept very poorly last night and kept waking him up. I want him to sleep until he wakes. If he wants he can stay home or come to the office. Its his choice.” “Yes Herr Major.” She says. I get to the office before Christian and make some coffee. Anna taught me her way. It is so much better then my turpentine. As I am pouring a cup Hans walks in. “Herr Major I am surprised to see you so early.” “I couldn’t sleep so I figured I would come get work done.” “Maybe you should try some more sir. Your eyes are very red.” “I will be fine.” “Yes Herr Major.” I walk into the office and open a fresh package of cigarettes. I crumple the old package and toss it in the waste pail. I start on the never ending paper work and every so often get up to get a fresh cup of coffee. About eleven Ben comes in and looks at me like hes hurt. “You just left me.” He says. “I wanted you to get some sleep. I know I kept waking yup up last night.” “But, I still would have gotten up.” “I know Ben.” I smile at him as I say this. He half smiles and starts his “work”. Around noon time I look at Ben. I crumple another empty pack of cigarettes and reach to get another from my desk. Its empty. “Hmph” “What?” Ben says. “I am out of cigarettes. Want to ride with me to get some?” “Of course.” He says smiling. We go and get I my staff car and go through the gate without anyone stopping me. I go to a little store and Ben walks in a step behind me. Dressed in his black Jewstappo suit as I have started to call it. Not to him but in my mind. The shopkeeper sees me and knows me. “I need four cartons of cigarettes please.” I say to him. I see he has bottles of Coke sitting in crushed ice. I haven’t had a coke in ages. I get out three and sit them on the counter. After I pay I open two of them and we head to the car. “Got you a Coke.” He takes a sip and sighs, then belches. “Excuse me, and thank you.” I take sip of mine and force a belch. “Good Cokes huh?” He just giggles and sips at his treat. It must be a year since I had one and it is tasting great. By the time we re back to camp I have finished mine. But. Ben is savoring his. He is about half done with it. I walk into the office and hand Christian a Coke. “I thought you needed this.” “Thank you sir.” He says and pops the cap off on the edge of his desk and takes a long pull. Afterwards letting out a belch. Ben giggles at him. “We both did the same thing.” Ben says giggling. “Its good thank you Herr Major.” “No thank you.” “For what sir?” “Just for being you.”He smiles “Thank you sir.” Ben and I go into the office and I open a fresh pack of cigarettes and inhale deeply. Ben goes back to his work and I to mine. I see him out of the corner of my eye sipping every so often on the soda. I think I should get him one more often. Its just not something I get often. I did enjoy it maybe I should. Around about three I am done with my work and I lean back and close my eyes a moment. I don’t even realize it but, I doze off. I don’t know how long I am sleeping for when Ben takes my hand and calls my name. I wake up. “What Ben whats wrong?” “Nothing sir. I just figured we should go home since your sleeping.” “Well, I am done so lets get going.” Once we get home I sit in my chair bootless. I pick up the paper and light a cigarette and start reading. Ben gets me a coffee and tells Anna I am very sleepy. He doesn’t think I will be awake much longer. “Yes he said he slept poorly last night.” “I was scared a few times he was screaming. He would wake up shaking.” “He is just worried Ben. He will be fine in a day or so.” “I hope so.” Ben walks out with my coffee and I am reading the paper. “What did Anna make for dinner.” I say through a yawn. “She made a stew.” “Good we can have more of her rolls then with it.” He smiles. “Yeah.” I sit back and start reading the paper and I light another cigarette. As I am reading I feel myself doze off. A few minutes later I am startled awake by the cigarette burning my fingers. I toss it quickly into the ashtray. “Son of a bitch.” I shout. “What happened?” Ben asks. “I burned myself is all. No big deal.” “Let me see.” I show him my fingers blistering. “I will get some butter. My mom always says put butter on a burn.” “Mine said that too.” I’m thinking how stupid of me. So I light another one and sip my coffee. I put some butter on it when he gets back and that takes a bit of the sting out. Not all, it still hurts like hell. After a while we go in and have our dinner. After we go out and no shows are on tonight either of us like so we sit in the chair and read together. As usual Ben is in his birthday suit and Laying on me. I always like that. Not just because he is naked. It is just very comforting. I am reading and apparently doze off. I don’t know how long I am sleeping for but, Ben wakes me up by rubbing my face with his soft little hand and saying my name. “What Benjamin?” “Why don’t you go to bed?” “Because I want to be with you.” “I will come with you.” “But, your reading, and its still early yet.” “But, you will be more comfortable.” “Only if you bring your book with you. I can obviously sleep with the light on.” “Fine.” He says relenting. I go in and undress and he as usual helps me hang up my things. I crawl up into bed and leave the light on. He crawls over the top of me and he has his head on my chest and is reading his book. I rub his hair until I fall asleep about twelve seconds later. I wake up later and the light is off and Ben is sleeping his head on my tummy. I rub his hair for a good while then fall back asleep. I just like to I guess pet him. His hair is so soft now that its grown out. It was soft before but to keep down the lice the children and men’s hair is shaved often. Now Ben doesn’t have to worry about that and hes actually very proud he has hair when the others don’t so much. At around six I wake up and feel very refreshed. I just needed a good nights rest is all. I head to the kitchen and have some coffee that was left over from last night. I make myself some toast and as I am Ben comes strolling out to join me. Anna isn’t here just yet so I start frying up some eggs for him and give him my toast. He of course lathers it thickly with some jam. As he eat his eggs and toast. I make myself some more and sit down. Anna walks in. “I would have done that Herr Major.” “I know its not a big deal Anna. I was already up and figured I can make some eggs.” She just smiles. “Anna I have a favor of you.” “Yes Herr Major?” “Will you teach me how to make your rolls before you go.” “Its a family secret but, for you I will.” She says smiling. “Thank you very much. I just adore those little rolls. They are so fluffy and buttery. I just cant imagine life without them.” She smiles at the compliment and gets to work making bread for the day. After Ben and I finish eating we both get dressed and head to the office. We get there and Ben the good valet he is, makes coffee for me. I go in and sit down and open a fresh package of cigarettes. I light one and start in on the damn never ending paperwork. At noontime I look at Ben who is teaching Gavriel at this time. “Ben why don’t you and Gavriel go and have lunch at the house.” “OK I will bring you something back.” He says. “No thank you I don’t care for anything.” “You have been doing so good at eating sir. Please have something.” “I understand your concern. I just am not hungry.” I say in a tone he knows not to push me on. “Yes sir.” He and Gavriel go and have lunch and are back in about an hour. He sits an apple on my desk and looks at me with pleading eyes. “Fine.” I say and take a huge bite of it. It is so juicy the juice runs down my arm. “Dammit. I say and slip off my jacket and roll up my sleeve to wipe it off. Who wants a sticky arm all day. Gavriel and Ben just giggle. I however, and not as amused. I leave my sleeve up and finish the apple. Once I’m done I get back into my uniform and look proper. After an hour or so Gavriel leaves and Ben and I finish our work. He is getting things ready for tomorrow morning as I finish up today’s work. I light a cigarette and crush the empty package and open a fresh pack. My third for the day. I have been chain smoking now a few months. I don’t see any point in slowing down or stopping. We are all going to die. With this madman in charge probably sooner then later. “Its only about 330 and too early to go home yet. “Go get Christian Ben.” He does and Christian comes in. “Yes Herr Major?” “Christian please take the staff car down and get us all a Coke that was nice.” “Yes Herr Major.” “Ben would you like to go with him?” “Yes sir.” “Fine I will see you both in a few minutes then.” I hear them take off in the car and I lean back and take the last drag from my cigarette. I light another from it and snuff it out. I go and get another cup off coffee. I think this is the third pot Ben has made today. I empty the container into my cup and head back to the office to sit down. I take a deep drag from my cigarette and gulp down half a cup of coffee. I have a terrible pain in my chest. I put my hand up and clutch my chest. I cant hardly breath it feels like someone is sitting on my chest. I stand up and fall to my knees. “Oh this hurts. It cant happen yet.” I whisper because that’s all I can do. I fall backwards and bang my head on my chair. I see stars like on the cartoons in the movies. That’s the last thing I remember until I wake up and Ben is over me looking terrified. “Hans wake up please wake up.” My eyes flutter open and I see him. “Oh Ben I love you so much.” I whisper. “Christian went to get the doctor.” “I’m fine.” I say and try to get up. I cant its like I have zero strength. “Ben help me up.” He tries in vain to lift me. I’m six feet and 180 pounds. He is four feet and maybe eighty. I grab at the chair and it rolls to me. I use it to pull myself up and I get into the chair. I don’t want anyone seeing me laying on the floor. “I am so tired Ben. Just so tired.” I say. I want to lay my head on the desk but, he wont let me. “No stay awake. Stay awake for me.” “I will for you Ben. I love you so much. I want yo to have everything.” I whisper. Just then the doctor comes racing in with his bag Christian behind him. My head is killing me and I reach up to touch it and it feels wet. Very wet. How odd I think why is my hair wet. Just then I see spots and I’m out. I wake up again in bed. I look up and see Ben and my Sergeant standing over me. “What happened where am I?” “Your in the infirmary Herr Major.” Christian says. “Close the door. I want to tell you something.” Ben goes and closes the door and I tell my Sergeant to come closer as I cant talk very loud. “You love Ben right?” “Yes Herr Major. He is like my own son.” “I love him with all my heart.” “I know Herr Major.” “I need a favor from you. It is for Ben and you mustn’t tell a soul.” “Yes Herr Major. Anything for Benjamin.” He says softly. Saturday I have an appointment with a man. I don’t know if I will make it. But, it must be kept. You must go for me if I cant. Ben knows where it is. He will show you.” “What is it about Herr Major?” “Christian I feel I can trust you. I feel we are the same in our hearts that what we are doing is wrong. But, we must for our own lives.” He looks at me and I think he understands what I mean. “You can trust me Herr Major with anything.” “If you tell anyone it will mean my life.” “I think I know what you are meaning Herr Major.” “Christian. Cal me Hans in private please. I feel as though we are becoming friends.” “Yes Her…Hans.” “What do you think I am meaning before I go any further?” He looks at the door and around him to make sure no one can hear. He leans in and whispers in my ear. “You are going to help him escape.” He lifts his head slightly. I nod my head yes very slowly. “His family and Anna’s too.” I whisper. “I would be honored to keep this meeting for you Herr. …. Hans.” He says with a big grin. “Ben knows where it is. Please take him with you tonight. I know he is scared and worried about me. I think he will be better with you and your family then in my house all night worrying. Or, at his mothers. Please keep him safe Christian. Keep him safe.” I say and fall asleep. I wake several hours later and its dark. I am feeling a bit better. I touch my head and there is a bandage on it. I try to get up and am so dizzy I don’t dare try any more. I sit and I think. I am certain I can trust Christian. If not it is a fatal mistake on my part. It would mean my life which is not great but better then that of Ben’s and Anna’s and their families. I think and plan how to make certain their escape is successful. I have already gotten the new papers for them. I have them in my safe. I just need to get pictures to complete them. That’s not going to be too hard. But, I have to be better before that happens. I have to get up and around. I think for hours and I see the sun coming up. A bit after that a nurse comes in. “How are you feeling Herr Major?” She asks. “Like I was hit by a truck.” She smiles a pert little smile. “It seems you fell and hit your head pretty hard. The doctor put in thirty eight stitches. You were bleeding profusely. Its good you were found quickly.” “Yes I suppose it is. When can I get out of here?” “That is up to the doctor.” “When will he be in?” “A few hours.” “That’s ridiculous I want him here now.” “Herr Major you aren’t in charge right now.” “The Hell you say. Call him and get him here now. I have very important things to tend to.” “I will see what I can do Herr Major.” “You will see to it he is here quickly.” I command her. “I will call Herr Major.” She says and walks out the door after she writes a few things on my chart. I am a bit bitter at her flippant attitude towards me. OK I am a lot bitter I am down right pissed. I sit up and am able too. I throw my legs over the side of the bed and I stand up and test my sea legs. Because that’s a bit what they feel like. I will not be denied I think. I have way too much riding on this. I walk over slowly to the cupboard and open it and see my uniform. I carry it over to the bed and I sit it on the bed. My jacket is ruined as well as my shirt from the blood. Son of a bitch I think. I sit on the bed and slide on my pants. I then slip on a sock and all is going well enough. Its not easy as my head feels like its a hundred pounds. I put on the other and I slip my short on. I button it up. Its all crooked I buttoned it wrong but, I don’t give a damn. I slip on my jacket and walk over to the cupboard and get my boots. I slip one on leaning against the wall then the other. I look dammit no coat. I don’t give a shit. I walk out of the room and out of the infirmary and to my little house. I walk in and am down right furious by this point that the nurse was so dismissive with me. I will have her hide I think. I walk in the front door and go to my bedroom. I hear someone in the bathroom and I walk in to see who it is. I see Channa and Golda in the tub hair all soaped up. “Herr Major.” Channa stands up and holds out her arms to me. I walk over and hug her. Her wet arms draped around me. It doesn’t matter the top of my uniform is ruined anyway. I hug her back. “I was scared for you. They said they found you in your office bleeding.” She says lightly touching the bandage on my head. “Oh sweeties I am fine. I just slipped is all. I am happy you are getting clean.” “Yes Herr Major. We like to take baths here because the water is warm.” Golda says. She leans forward and kisses my cheek. I kiss hers back. “I wish I could give everyone hot water but, as you know I cant.” “We know Herr Major. You have blood all over your shirt and jacket.” Golda says. “Are you sure you are alright?” “I’m walking and talking. So I guess I am just fine. I just came to get a clean uniform and go to work.” Just then Anna walks in to check on the girls. “Herr Major you are supposed to be in the hospital.” “Well I’m not.” I say kind of crappy to her. “Yes Herr Major.” She says as if I scolded her. “I apologize Anna. I am just a little upset at the nurse. I didn’t mean to be cruel sounding to you.” She looks at me. “Maybe you should lie down a while. The girls and I will tend to you.” “Maybe for a while. But, I need to get to the office and get my work done.” She takes my arm and guides me to the bed and She looks at my uniform. “I may be able to clean this jacket. But, I am afraid the shirt is ruined.” She says as she pushes me to sitting on the bed. She takes off my jacket and looks at it a second. “Maybe. Maybe not.” She sits it pendik escort on the chair I have in my room. “She looks at my shirt all miss buttoned. She just shakes her head at me. She unbuttons my shirt and pushes me to lay down. I am doing as she is kind of forcing me to do. Not to mention I really don’t have the strength to fight her. Even if I wanted too. She takes off one of my boots then the other. I am getting kind of sleepy as she is doing this. Maybe I should rest a while. She pulls of my pants next and then removes my socks. I have never been nude in front of Anna before. I am a little self conscious but I don’t care because I am feeling a little groggy. She helps me scoot around so my head is on the pillows. I grab another one so I have three and prop myself up so I am sitting. “Anna get me my cigarettes and a cup of coffee.” “You don’t need them right now.” She says and walks out of the room. “Hmph.” Is everyone going to ignore me today. Channa comes out of the bathroom naked at this point. She is such a lovely little girl. If I liked girls her and Goldie would be perfect. I look at her nakedness and she has no shame. “Channa go get me a cigarette just don’t let Anna see you.” She smiles and comes back a moment later with a cigarette. “Now go get my lighter from my pants please.” She does that. And I light my cigarette. “Will you read me a story?” She asks. “Sure sweetie.” Go get that book right there on the shelf with the blue binding and the gold letters.” Its the Hans Christian Anderson book. She gets it and brings it over. She gets up on the bed with me and I pull back the covers and she slides in next to me. I open the book and start to read. She slides up on my tummy and I look over her head. Golda comes out now and is naked as well. She truly is a sight for a girl. Lovely girl that she is. “Can I join you two?” She asks sweetly. “Sure.” I say and I scoot over a little and she hops in bed beside me. She snuggles in and hugs my arm as she does. It feels so natural and comfortable. I am done with my cigarette as I had it in my mouth while I was reading. “Here Golda put this in the ashtray for me please.” I say wiggling it at her. She takes it carefully from my lips and puts it out. I go back to reading and a few minutes later Anna walks in. “You girls should let the Major rest.” She says scolding them. “Oh bullshit. I am having a good time reading to them. Besides they like when I read to them. Anna get me my cigarettes please and a cup of coffee.” “Smells like you have already been smoking.” She says sniffing the air. “So if I already have why not continue?” She turns on her heal and walks out of the room. She just completely blew me off I think to myself. After I finish the story I am reading I look at Golda. “Golda go get my cigarettes off the coffee table please.” “Yes Herr Major.” She slips from under the covers and brings them back. “Thank you sweetheart at least you two do what I ask of you.” I give them both a kiss Golda on her cheek and Channa on top of her head. “Why don’t you go get a brush Gold you girls hair is mussed a bit. I will brush it out for you and braid it.” She smiles at me and goes and gets my brush. I starts with Channa because she is on my tummy. I sit up a bit and she scoots down to my lap. I start bushing her pretty long hair and as I do she starts gently squeezing my cock. I know she isn’t trying to turn me on or anything. Its just something for her to play with. Of course being 23 it gets hard. She giggles when it does. “It got big.” She says. Now its up between her legs and I see it right next to her tender young pussy. I am not turned off by the sight. But, it isn’t something I really want. “It will do that sometimes. Especially when you are squeezing it.” I say. I start braiding her hair and she is toying with y cock as I do. It does feel rather nice. But, I don’t have any desire for her to bring me to fruition. I get done braiding her hair. “Channa over in that middle drawer are some ribbons I got for you girls for a little present. Why don’t you go get them for me.” I say and lift her off of me and sit her feet on the floor. She walks over and gets them. I have about six I got a while back. I just hadn’t given them to them yet. I wasn’t waiting for any particular reason other then I hadn’t given them to them yet. I had actually forgotten. She comes back and I tie a ribbon on the end of the braid. My cock has gone down from lack of interest and attention it was getting. “Golda your next.” I say patting in front of me. I brush her hair and she too is curious about what Channa had found out so she starts squeezing my cock. Not hard nice little squeezes. As it gets hard she lightly runs her fingers over it. “It feels soft.” “It is soft.” I say. She is fiddling with the foreskin now and pulling it back and sliding it forward. It does feel really nice. I get done brushing her hair and then start braiding it. I am not really paying attention to her fiddling with my cock because it isn’t my desire for her to do it. Yet it doesn’t bother me either. Once I am done braiding her hair I ask her. “What color ribbon sweetie?” “I want the gold one.” “Gold for Golda makes sense to me.” I say and tie it around the end of her hair. “I look at then both.” “Well, I think you both look adorable.” “Herr Major you always say that.” Channa says. “OK You both look more adorable.” I say. This has Channa and Golda smiling. “Now go show Anna and tell her I want cup of coffee.” I scoot Golda off the bed and I light a cigarette. I inhale deeply. A few minutes later Anna comes in with a cup of coffee. Just as I am snuffing out my cigarette. She looks into the ashtray and sees three butts. “Well. At least you are smoking less.” “The girls calm me down.” “Yes they have a way to do that sometimes when they aren’t being rambunctious.” “Aw now the girls are so sweet.” She smiles. “Most of the time. You should take a nap now Herr Major.” Sounding like a small child I say. “I don’t want to take a nap.” She smiles at me. “Fine I will keep the girls in with me then so you can relax.” I look at her with pleading eyes. “Please don’t. I really don’t know how much longer I will see them for.” She nods her head understanding what I mean. “OK. But no horseplay.” “Anna when have you ever known me to horseplay?” She thinks a moment. “Well, never. So I guess I don’t need to say that do I?” “Thank you for the coffee.” She looks at me like I have been a bad child. “Yes but you wont have much today.” I smile and take a sip. A minute or so later after Anna leaves the girls come back in still naked. I am guessing Anna is washing their clothes and they are still wet. Either way it doesn’t matter to me. I like feeling their soft skin against me. It feels nice. Not in a sexy way. Just nice. “Welcome back girls. Shall we read Oh wait I know I used to love this story when I was a little boy. I get up and go get the book Robinson Crusoe. It was always exciting to me to read it as a boy.. Its fun and an exciting tale. I figure I am not going to the office today as I don’t think Anna will let me. I may think I am in charge. But, I know the real score here at least today. I get back in between the girls and settle in. I grab a cigarette and Channa lights it for me. She does enjoy that. “Anna said not to let you smoke too much today.” Golda says. “When I am with you girls I don’t want to smoke so much.” I say kissing the tops of both of their heads. I crack open the book and begin. “I was born in the year 1632 in the city of York, of a good family….” The girls snuggle in and I have pulled the covers up a bit as its a bit chilly in the room for being naked. I feel Channa’s hand start to squeeze my cock as I read. It doesn’t get hard for a while and when it does she smiles like she has accomplished a great feat. I smile at her and she continues to squeeze every now and then when it starts to go down. After a while she gets tired of my toy and just runs her fingers through my chest hair as I read. Golda is petting my arm that is closest to here as I read. I don’t mind at all. Its nice to be petted. To be lovingly stroked by two little girls I love and adore. I wish that one day maybe I could have little girls of my own. It would be fun to dress them in fancy clothes and do up their hair. I am thinking while I read. I am reading for about an hour when I hear a knock on the door. Anna I hear goes to the door and opens it. “Herr Doctor. I am guessing you are here to check on the patient?” She says loudly enough for me to hear. “Girls go in the bathroom and shit the door and not a sound.” I say to them. It wouldn’t be good for me if the doctor caught me naked in the bad with two Jewish girls would it. So I lean back against the pillow as if I am dozing. He walks in the door to my bedroom. I open my eyes as I hear his foot steps on the floor. “You are supposed to be in the hospital.” “Your nurse should have listened to me.” I say back in a very shitty tone. “Yes. Well. Maybe so.” He says and sits on the edge of my bed. “Let me have a look at that nasty cut on your head.” He reaches over and starts to unravel the bandage on my head. It takes a minute and he looks at it. “Yes it looks very nice now. So now that you are awake what happened yesterday?” “I slipped on something on the floor and I imagine I hit my head on the desk or chair.” “Hmmm. When you came in your heart was palpitating. I would guess you have been smoking way too much and having way too much coffee. I wold venture to guess that is what happened.” “I hardly think so. I smoke very little.” He looks at my hands and the nicotine stains. “Very little I would guess at least two to three packs a day.” “Maybe lately its possible I suppose. I have been under a lot of deadlines lately.” “I see. Is it causing you any undue stress?” “No more then usual.” “How much coffee do you drink in a day?” “I wouldn’t know. I guess four sometimes five cups.” “Hmm I would venture to say a pot or two with your answers.” “Are you calling me a liar?” “No Herr Major. Just not being truthful with yourself.” “Hmph.” I say and cross my arms in front of my chest. “Do you eat properly?” “Yes of course. It was my cook who answered the door. She makes me healthy meals.” “I see.” He says and wraps my head with new bandages. “I would say you need to stay home for the rest of the week. Start back next Monday.” “But, I have a ton of paperwork every day.” “One thing I know about paperwork is it will be there on Monday.” “But, I will get so far behind It will take weeks to get caught up.” “I will let the commandant know you are in need of rest. I am sure if you need it he will assign a helper for you.” “Bah!!” “Sometimes we all need some help.” He says as he finishes wrapping my head. “I will stay home until Thursday then back to work.” “If you wish. But, it is against my orders. I cant force you to do anything. But, I will strongly suggest to the commandant you are off until Monday. I am certain he will agree.” “If you are threatening me with the commandant I am hardly afraid of him.” I say and nod at a picture on the wall of me and Heinrich Himmler laughing and his arm around me. He looks. “Hmm. Nice picture. I still suggest you stay home until Monday and relax. Enjoy your book.” He says as he sees I am reading. He slips it off the bed side table and drops it on my chest lightly. “BAH!!” He looks at me a second. “Bah!” He says and sticks out his tongue at me. I just chuckle at his childish antics. “Fine. How about I go in Sunday and work a while.” “I would agree to that.” He says and puts his hat back on. “I am going to stop by tomorrow around this time to check on you. If you have any feelings of nausea or start vomiting have someone get me immediately. Other then that take some head ache tablets. And relax.” He pulls out a bottle of tablets and sits them on the table. “How many?” “Two every four to six hours. If you need them less that’s fine too.” “Tomorrow then.” I say. “Indeed.” I hear him talking to Anna as he is leaving. “Don t let him have too much coffee and not more then a package of cigarettes a day.” “How much coffee?” I hear her ask concern in her voice. “Maybe three or four cups spread out in the day. Make him drink water. Lots of water its good for him.” “Bah.” I say to myself. I hear him leave and the girls peak their heads out. “Is he gone?” Channa whispers. “Yes hes gone.” “You lied to the doctor.” Golda says. “How?” “You told him you don’t smoke very much. You smoke a lot anymore.” “Maybe so.” The girls climb back in bed with me and I start reading again. I am on chapter five now and am starting to get a little sleepy. I read this chapter. “Girls I am kind of tired. I want to take a nap for a while.” “OK.” I pull out the extra pillow and figure they will go out with Anna. Instead they snuggle up against me and they both rub their fingers over my chest hair and Channa is swirling her finger around my nipple. It is a nice way to go to sleep. I sleep well for I don’t know how long. I would guess two hours or so. The girls are sleeping with their heads on my chest and one of them has a firm grip on my very hard bouncing cock. I have to pee pretty bad so I carefully slip out of the bed not to disturb them and go to pee. I see a glass of water next to the bed and my cigarettes are gone. “Hmphh.” I let the water works flow and head back out and look in the living room and see my cigarette box. “Hmphh!” I open it and take one out and light it with the table lighter. I grab the box and head back to the bedroom. I open the drawer to the bedside table and hide the box in there. Ha! I think. I sit in my chair in the bedroom and watch the girls sleep a while as I smoke. I put on my robe I grab the glass of water I take a gulp of it and pour the rest in the bathroom sink. I walk out to the kitchen and Anna is busy doing something. “I drank my water may I have some coffee now?” Without turning around she says. “Did you drink it or pour it in the sink?” Blasted women I think. “Fine if I can have some coffee I will drink another glass.” I say and fill it up and drink it. “Good Major.” She says. “Go lay back down with the girls and I will bring it in to you.” “Fine.” I walk back in and the girls are still napping. I climb carefully back between then and they both snuggle back up on my chest. One of their hands is back on my soft cock. Something new I guess. Is what I am thinking. A few minutes later Anna comes in with some coffee. “Thank you.” “For every two glasses of water you drink I will bring you some coffee.” She sits it on the table and walks out. “Hmph.” I say after her. I kind of slide up and reach over trying not to disturb the girls as I do. I take a sip of coffee and feel a squeeze on my limp cock. Then another. I look down and Channa is smiling. I smile back at her and take another sip. I sit and drink my coffee and Channa seems to enjoy playing with my cock so I let her. I know she cant bring me off and I don’t want her too. But, its just natural curiosity I think. After a while we sit not talking and Golda wakes up. “I need to pee.” She says sleepily. She slides out of bed and goes to pee. “Me too.” Channa says and rolls over the top of me. I get the other pillow and prop myself up better and when they get back we read until a little after five. I hear Ben come in and take off his boots. He comes in the bedroom and looks at us and smiles. “Have you been taking good care of Herr Major?” He asks. “Yes.” Channa says. “I see he did your hair just like you like him too.” “Yes.” Golda says. “I don’t think we will have our lesson today as I don’t want to disturb the Majors rest.” “We understand.” Channa says. “Hes been reading us a book about a man that gets lost on a deserted island and he meets a man he calls Friday. Its really fun.” “Yes it is. I read it a while back. I hope you girls can come tomorrow and keep Herr Major company and out of trouble.” Both smile. “Sure we will.” They both say. “The Major is fun. I like the stories he reads us.” Channa says. Anna appears in the door. “Come on girls your clothes are dry lets let the Major spend some time with Ben.” They both kiss me on the cheek and Channa gives my cock one last squeeze as she does and giggles. I kiss them both on their cheeks. “Thank you girls for keeping me company today. I look forward to seeing you tomorrow.” Channa walks back to the side of the bed and looks at me very seriously. “Herr Major.” “Yes Channa.” “I love you.” “I love you too Channa. Soon you will see just how much.” I say and pull her up and hug her tightly. I pat her on her naked little bottom and she hugs me back rubbing her little hands on my back as she does. They go out and a few minutes later we hear the door shut as they leave. “The doctor came by the office. He said you smoke too much and drink too much coffee.” Ben says to me. “What does he know.” “Hes a doctor. He knows a lot.” “Maybe. But, its the only enjoyment I get.” Ben looks at me hurt in his eyes. “Don’t you enjoy me?” “Oh Ben I didn’t mean it like that.” “Please slow down on them please.” “I will try OK?” This makes him smile. “Come here and give me a hug Ben. I have been wanting to hold my Ben all day.” “You had two to hold all day.” “Yeah but, its different its not you.” I say hugging him close. I kiss the top of his head. “You love them though don’t you?” “Of course I love the girls. But, I love them way way different then I love you.” “So you wouldn’t make love to them?” “Honey you know me better then that. Girls have nothing I want.” “You could poke them in the butt.” I sigh at this. “It wouldn’t be the same. I love you Ben only you like that.” “What about Gavriel?” “I love him but, its not the same as I love you. I love you more then anyone I have every known and probably ever will.” He kisses my neck and my cock is starting to rise. I have been hard half the day it seems between the girls. “Ben would you know..” I say and look down at the tent in the bed. He slides the covers back and takes me into his sweet little mouth. I watch as his lips slide down on my hard cock. He takes my balls into his hands and slowly manipulates them. Within a minute I am unloading in his mouth. With a ferocious orgasm. I shoot seven heavy hard shots into his mouth. He gulps down every drop. Once he sucks me dry he takes his sweet young mouth off my cock and looks at me. “You have never done it that fast before.” “Channa and Golda kept playing with it today. I was hard half the day.” “Did you like it?” “I didn’t hate it. But, I had no desire to have my feelings of love with them that way.” “Are you hungry Hans?” “I am famished. Anna keeps feeding me But I am starving anyway.” “Sit here I will go get a plate and put it on a tray for you.” “I want a cup of coffee too.” He smiles at me and heads to the kitchen. I lean back and think. I am not an invalid. But, it is kind of nice being pampered for a while. A few minutes later he comes back with a bed tray loaded with a plate of Stew and Anna’s rolls. “Thank you. Wheres the coffee?” “Anna left a note says you have to drink two glasses of water first.” “Hmphh.” “You can hmph all you want. But, I love you and I am going to do what the doctor ordered.” “Anna ordered it not the doctor.” “So should I get you another glass when you finish that one?” I take it and drink it all down. He takes the glass and fills it in the bathroom sink. He brings it back and I down that one too. He walks just outside the bedroom door and he grabs the cup and brings it in. “I knew you would do that.” I roll my eyes at him and take the cup and sip it. “The things I have to do.” “Aren’t you going to eat with me?” “You only have the one tray.” “Oh. Here you and me will share then.” I say and put a piece of potato on the fork and feed it to him. I take a bite. Then give him one. He takes a roll and dips it in the gravy and takes a bite. I feed him a piece of meat and he gives me roll dipped in gravy. He takes a drink of my coffee. “That doesn’t count against me I get another later.” He smiles at me. “We will see.” and giggles. It looks like your nails need trimmed.” I say as I look at his hand. “Yes they do.” He says and smiles at me. I will never get tired of looking into those green eyes. They are so lovely. We eat like that and he does get me another coffee. Which seems fair since he drank half of it. We go to sleep that night and he wont let me make love to him unless he is on top. I don’t mind I like when he rides me like that. Sometimes he is upright. Sometimes he rides against my chest. I really like both. But it is hotter when he is rubbing his cock up and down my belly and sliding me in and out. I like that the best. We doze off and before I know it the morning has arrived. Ben leaves and the girls come back. They of course are naked and like squeezing my cock. Seems its Golda’s day on Wednesday. Then before I know it its Saturday morning.

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