Cocklust Ch. 22

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They say absence makes your heart grow fonder. Apparently the same thing is true for your dick.

The longer Chad was gone, the more I found myself craving him. I missed the smell of his skin, the warmth of his touch, and the comforting weight of his body on mine. I even missed the things that had bugged me before, like the crap he’d leave lying on the floor, and the uninteresting stuff he’d make us watch on T.V.

Even just walking around campus, I’d see guys shooting hoops, which would always remind me of him. I’d end up daydreaming in lectures, and which pretty much always got me hard. I got to be adept at hiding my boners in public. I started wearing looser clothes, and I mastered the art of surreptitiously slipping my dick in my waistband.

Chad and I did talk of course, which was always the highlight of my day. I knew it was a release for him too. I could tell how much strain he was under, though he didn’t usually let on. I made it my mission to cheer him up as much as I humanly could.

Most nights we had to squeeze in our alone time after I’d finished my classes and Chad had gotten back from the hospital. We usually ended up jacking off over Skype. It was always awesome to watch him pound his pud while I pounded my own. We tried to time our loads so we’d both shoot at once, though sometimes we were more successful than others.

The calls almost always ended the same way. We’d both be lying in bed, naked and wet, while we blew each other kisses and told each other good night. But those moments were always bittersweet. We both knew that as soon as we hung up, we’d each go back to being alone.

The saving grace was our support system. On one night in particular I was lying in bed, having just finished with Chad, when I got a call from Amy. “All right,” she said without so much as a hello. “I guess I’m officially your consigliere.”

“Say what?”

“Well,” she said, “we just had Johan’s intervention.”

I sat up in bed. “W-what?”

“I made the trip myself.”

“Now wait, I didn’t ask you to do that—”

“It’s fine,” she said. “I had to visit Northwestern anyway. I might as well kill two birds with one stone.”

I started to feel a hint of relief. “S-so… how did it go?”

“It was basically what you’d expect. We sat Johan down and read him the riot act. Then Rosie made him unlock his phone and computer, and she went through his stuff. It turned out he’d been a helluva photo collector.”

“Y-you mean—”

“Apparently he’d been lurking online and asking guys for their pics. He seemed to have quite the library… at least till Rosie wiped it out.”

I licked my lips. “So my pictures are gone?”

“Yeah,” she said, “along with God-knows-how-many others.”

“Oh thank God,” I said as I felt my muscles loosen up.

“You should block him from your phone and e-mail too. To be safe.”

“I did that already.”

“Good boy.”

I took a deep breath. “Listen, I uh…”

Amy waited for a second. “You what?”

“Well, I owe you one,” I said. “Big time.”

“It’s fine. Maybe you can return the favor someday… but I’m not keeping score.”

I nodded. “Thanks.”

“Are you okay? You sound pretty glum.”

“Well, I dunno if that’s really the way to put it…”

“Then how else would you say it?”

“I mean… I’m okay I guess. It’s just the situation that sucks. Chad’s birthday is next week, but he’ll be either stuck in that hospital, or hanging out by himself. Either way, it’s not cool.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It is what it is.”

“What are you getting him?”

“You mean for his birthday?”

“No, for Talk Like a Pirate Day,” she quipped. “For shit’s sake, Scott, what do you think I could’ve meant?”

“I-I guess I haven’t thought that far ahead—”

“Why the hell not?”

“I just… I’m just trying to take things one step at a time.” Truth be told, I was trying to keep Chad’s birthday out of sight and out of mind. I really hated the idea of spending it apart. I would’ve done anything to take him out to a nice dinner or something, the way he’d done for me. I also felt a little guilty about Christmas, when I’d just gotten him a small gift yet he’d spent so much money on me.

“Actually,” Amy said, “it sounds to me like you’ve got all the more reason to get him something special. I’m not saying you need to spend a lot of money, because that’s not what it’s about… you just need to be thoughtful.”

“Okay… so what do you suggest?”

Even over the phone, I could sense Amy rolling her eyes. “Oh my God,” she said. “I would think a gay guy would get this.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“You’re as hopeless as Dad! What, were you planning on getting him mop heads too?”

I scoffed. Amy was referring to a time when we were kids, when Dad had gifted Mom a bunch of cleaning supplies. He’d apparently thought this was a good idea, since we really did need them, and he’d gotten Casibom a good deal on them. But he’d never lived it down. “Now wait, I’m not that clueless—”

“Oh we’ll see about that,” Amy said. “What’s Chad even into when he’s not around you?”

“I dunno,” I said. “I mean, he’s obviously into basketball… and rugby I guess.”

“What are his favorite teams?”

“I know he likes the Lakers, but I don’t know about that rugby stuff. He told me about it once, but I don’t remember the details—”

“Omigod you’re a mess. What kind of music does he like? Or movies? Books? T.V.?”

I remembered how Chad had mentioned the Night’s Watch. “Well, he definitely digs Game of Thrones,” I said, “and he does like to read, though you probably wouldn’t think it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you’ve seen what he looks like. He’s not exactly bookish.”

“See, now we’re getting somewhere. You’re telling me who he is behind the facade.”

I acted annoyed— because after all that’s what brothers do— but secretly I welcomed Amy’s help. She’d always been more sensitive than I was, and she seemed to gauge people’s feelings in a way I never could.

She asked me a bunch more questions, and after much discussion, she gave me a bunch of tips. Then she sent me off to go shopping. The first thing I bought was a beard-trimming kit. I tried to get Chad tickets to a game, but the Lakers weren’t playing in D.C. anytime soon, and neither were any of the other teams he liked. Rugby was also out of season. But I did get my hands on something I hoped he’d be into: an autographed copy of the original book A Game of Thrones.

I also sent Chad a gift I couldn’t tell Amy about. Since he’d sent me naughty pictures for my birthday, I figured I should reciprocate. Especially after what had happened with Johan, I wanted to show Chad how much I trusted him. I also wanted to give him as much jack off material as I could.

I ended up doing more than just taking pictures. Over the course of a few days, I recorded a whole bunch of videos of myself getting off. I made sure to give him some nice variety. One video started with a striptease— a nice slow one to get him horned up— till I couldn’t take it any longer, and I eventually shot my load in the camera lens. Another video had me fucking myself with the dildo of Chad’s dick, while I told him how badly I wanted the real thing. I recorded stuff in my bed, on my floor, and everywhere else I could manage. I even did a video at the gym, in the same bathroom stall where Chad and I had fucked.

As fate would have it, when I left the gym, I ran into Hannah. It was pretty awkward, especially since it confirmed what I’d always suspected. Hannah had clearly been the one who’d caught us having sex. I wanted to ask her exactly what she’d seen, but I decided not to go there. After all, even if she’d watched us at length, I’d already gotten back at her. I just shot her a glare, and she glared right back.

I tried to keep myself as busy as possible, to keep the loneliness at bay. I also needed money if I was going to make a trip to see Chad. I kept thinking ahead to Spring Break, which seemed like the next opportunity, though it still seemed far off.

I ended up applying for jobs at a bunch of restaurants around town. I made the rounds from Giulia’s Pizza to the Riedegost Ale House, and I interviewed with as many as I could. Riedegost was the first to take the bait. They asked me to start that weekend, which was fine by me.

When Chad’s birthday finally dawned, I texted him as soon as I woke up. Happy birthday sexy, I wrote. Then I sent him the first video of me. I can’t wait till you see the real thing.

Holy shit, he texted back a few seconds later. He couldn’t have had time to watch the whole thing, but he’d apparently gotten the gist. Talk about just what the doctor ordered! Then he added an eggplant emoji.

I was tempted to send him the second video then, but I decided to hold off. Instead I just showered and dressed.

By the time I got to my first class, I had another text waiting for me: You just made me jerk off in a public restroom.

Holy shit, I texted back. Seriously?

It was a sexual emergency, he wrote. It was either that or on the train.

I felt myself getting hard at the thought of Chad being so horny. I wanted to know details, but my lecture was about to start, so I had to take a raincheck. I just texted him back: In that case, enjoy this one too! And I sent him the next clip.

This went on for most of the day. By the time we finally got to Skype, I could tell his lust was practically boiling over. Mine was too, for that matter. I wanted to reach right through the screen and fuck him senseless. But I kept the tease going.

“So how’s my birthday boy?” I asked.

“Fuck,” he said facetiously, “are you trying to drive me crazy?”

“Did you get my package?”

“If you mean the one from FedEx, then yeah. But you seriously didn’t need Casibom Giriş to do that.”

“I wanted to.”

“Well, Game of Thrones hit the spot. I need a good fantasy I can escape to… and all that sex doesn’t hurt.”

“Isn’t it all straight sex in there?”

“Basically yeah,” he said, “but there’s also people like Loras and Renly.”

“Well… I’m glad it was a hit.”

“Of course it was. Everything you got me…” His voice trailed off for a second. “It was sweet. Thank you baby.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Now if you want to talk about the package I really want…” And he pointed at my crotch.

“You can have that too,” I said, “except I can’t FedEx it.”

“For now, you did the next-best thing.”

“Even if it caused a sexual emergency?”

“I never said that was a problem.”

I licked my lips. “So what happened, exactly?”

“Well, it was your fault. You sent me that video right when I was leaving the house.”


“It got me so fucking hard, even just thinking about it… I knew I couldn’t last. I had to stop at a coffee shop and pretend I was taking a dump.”

“Keep going.”

“I was already close, so it just took me a few seconds to cum. I almost shot across the stall. But I managed to aim so I didn’t make a mess.”

“That’s too bad,” I said. “I really like your messes.”

“I like yours too,” he said. “But I don’t think a random barista would appreciate having to clean that off the walls.”

“Maybe a random barista doesn’t know what he’s missing.”

“Maybe that’s not who I want taking my loads.”

My dick went totally rigid at the thought of taking Chad’s loads in any way shape or form. Unfortunately that was one more thing I couldn’t do over Skype. I wanted to just snap my fingers and jump forward in time, which was probably the biggest tease of all.

Chad and I did get off that night, and we both made a big show of it. But it was hardly a secret that I wanted more. I wanted to make out, I wanted to hold him, and I wanted to get fucked, none of which I could really do at that point. All I could do was count the days till the end of my limbo.

In the meantime, I did have other stuff to deal with. Brody in particular was still being a pain. Even though we’d kicked him out of the Kap Eps, he wasn’t going away. His dad had apparently called Luke and given him an earful. The way Luke told the story, Mr. Watkins had made a big deal out of how he himself was a Kap Ep, as if this entitled his kid to special treatment. Luke said in that case, Mr. Watkins should already know about the need to pay dues, and that refusing to do it could get him kicked out. The old man didn’t appreciate that.

Mr. Watkins kept escalating it till we were forced to vote on letting Brody back in. As it turned out, the results of this new vote were the same as before. All of us agreed Brody was being an asshole— once again— and this running home to Daddy was a chickenshit move. So we told the guy to pound sand.

Meanwhile, my job at Riedegost was a lot more involved than I’d expected. It was still a good gig compared to that internship I’d done. But waiting tables wasn’t as easy as I’d thought. I’d never realized how exhausting it could be to spend an eight-hour shift on my feet. I’d also never considered how much mental juggling it took to keep track of everyone’s orders, know each item on the menu, split checks correctly, and do all the behind-the-scenes shit you had to do. I had a whole new respect for people like Thaxter who’d been doing it for years.

Sometimes I’d see gay guys come in on a date. I’d always watch from a distance as they flirted back and forth. Some would play footsie or even make out. I couldn’t help feeling jealous, since I wanted so badly to be in their shoes. Whenever they sat at my tables, I had to work extra hard to keep a straight face. Most of those dudes could tell I was one of them, based on how they talked to me, and we seemed to establish a weird unspoken bond. But it still wasn’t easy, especially when I had to hide another boner.

Some days seemed to fly by, but others seemed to go in slow motion. This was especially true around midterm time, since Spring Break was now tantalizingly close. I kept trying to study, but I always got distracted. Each time I looked at my computer— or my phone or my iPad— I saw the date and time staring back at me. I felt like I was watching a pot and waiting for it to boil.

The worst was at night, when I would toss and turn for hours. I kept worrying something else would go wrong: that my trip would get canceled, or that Chad would get pulled away for something important, or who-knows-what else. I knew my anxiety wouldn’t go away till Chad was right in front of me.

By the time I finished my last exam, my anticipation had built to a fever pitch. I hadn’t jacked off that day, or even the night before, at Chad’s request. I was basically drowning in hormones, and my emotions were Casibom Güncel Giriş tied up in knots. I could hardly believe my wait was almost over.

I high-tailed it off campus as quickly as I could manage. I couldn’t get to D.C. fast enough. I kept wanting the airline people to pick up the pace. The pilot even said we were going six hundred miles an hour, which to me was still too fucking slow.

When I finally landed, I Ubered to the house where Chad was staying. My heart was pounding when the car pulled up to the curb. I checked the address one last time, to make sure I was really there. It looked like no one was home, since the sun had gone down and all the windows were dark. But I finally got out of the car, grabbed my suitcase from the trunk, and walked up to the door.

Before I could knock, the knob turned, and the door cracked open. “Come on in babe,” came a voice.

Chad’s baritone almost made me melt. I wasn’t hearing him over a speaker this time. I was hearing him for real, from just a few feet away— even though I still couldn’t see him.

I stepped through the doorway, and there he was. Most of his body was in shadow, except for a silvery light that shone across his neck. He was wearing nothing but a sexy cologne.

“Holy fuck,” I said as I dropped my suitcase and jumped into his arms.

Chad gripped me so hard that he nearly knocked the wind out of me. His lips slammed against mine, and his tongue went right in my mouth. I tripped against his feet, and together we fell against the wall. “Scott, you sonofabitch,” he said between kisses.

“Fuck,” was the only thing I could say. I seemed to have lost the capacity for coherent thought. I was operating on pure adrenaline. I inhaled his scent, and I ran my hands along his bare body. One finger touched his dick, which was just as hard as I expected.

“Careful,” he said, “I don’t want to cum too soon…”

“I’ve been wanting your cum for months.”

“The feeling’s mutual,” he said, “but I don’t want to fuck this up.” He caressed my cheek with his lips. “Shit, I love you so fucking much…”

“I love you too…”

“Fucking A.” Chad slid his hand under my coat, then peeled it off me.

I wanted to get as naked as he was. I was almost tempted to fuck him right then and there. But before I could take off any other clothes, Chad wrapped his fingers around mine, then gripped my hand.

“Come with me,” he said.

We broke off our embrace, at least for a second, so he could take me to his room. As he did, I saw glints of light dabbling across his butt. I had to resist the urge to grab it and dive in.

Chad opened the door to the guest room. It was practically spotless— very un-Chad-like— with a carefully-made queen size bed. A bottle of wine sat on the dresser, along with two matching glasses. “C’mere,” he said as he plopped on the bed, and his boner smacked against his pubes.

I jumped on top of him, and we went back to making out. Chad put his hands on my ass, and he started tracing my crack. I was dying for him to touch my crotch, though I knew I was as close to cumming as he was.

“Aw baby,” Chad said. “I need you so bad…” Then he grappled with my shirt and pulled it over my head.

I got up from the bed, undid my pants, and yanked them down. I pulled off my socks and my underwear, and my package popped out.

“Get back down here,” Chad said.

I followed his orders, crouched down, and started kissing his chest. I could practically feel his heart beating underneath. I nibbled on his chest hair, then ran my tongue between his pecs. I felt his beard brush against his face, and I noticed how nicely pruned it was. “I see you put that trimmer to good use,” I said.

“For you babe… you’re the one who has to make out with that.”

“I wouldn’t give that up for the world.”

Chad’s body writhed on the bed. “Fuck,” he said.

“Do you want me to ride you?”

“Not yet,” he said as he rolled over. “First it’s my turn to bottom. And it’s obviously been a while, so you’ll need to loosen me up.” He spread his legs and stuck his ass up so his hole was staring right at me.

I wasn’t about to object. I assumed the position and stuck my face in his crack. His ballsack hung down by my chin, and I felt a tickle from a few of his hairs. I pressed my lips against him so they surrounded his pucker. Then I stuck out my tongue and gave his hole a quick lick.

“Oh fuck,” he gasped. “Do more of that… please…”

I held my mouth against him, harder this time, and I started sucking on his flesh. As I did, I flicked my tongue against the most tender part of his skin. I felt his sphincter tense up, but then it relaxed. His muscles seemed to be twitching involuntarily.

“Yeah… that feels so good…”

I ran my tongue in a zig-zag pattern, then made a couple quick circles. Then, when I couldn’t take it anymore, I pressed forward and pierced his hole.

The inside of his ass tasted just how I remembered. There was nothing gross or off-putting about it; in fact, I couldn’t get over how sexy it was. Chad was such a manly man, and his muscles were so perfectly toned, that I couldn’t imagine anything hotter. Except maybe his cock.

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