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“I feel ridiculous. People are looking at me. Give me the coverup back, and then I’ll take the walk.”
“No can do, Steph, and people looking at you is the whole idea. You look amazing. If I were straight, I’d be bothering the hell out of you.”
“How did I get myself into this? I haven’t worn a bikini since elementary school. I’m like 80% naked.”
“Because we both agreed that you need to get laid.”
“You mean because I was drunk.”
“Drunk and horny. Very horny, like…it was sad. Like, if I had a vagina, I wouldn’t have felt safe around you.”
“You really know how to build a girl up, Nate.”
“I don’t think you understand how easy it is for someone like you to find a hookup.”
“Ugh, is that really what I want?”
“Are you ready to give your whole heart and soul to a new relationship?”
“No. I’d just be comparing them to Michelle.”
“And, are you still so sexually frustrated that you can barely concentrate on anything but tits and ass at work?”
“That statement was coerced out of me.”
“Honey, I didn’t even ask.”
“Well, Jose Cuervo did most of the coercion, but I wasn’t the one pouring the drinks.”
“Enough talk, Sweetie. You walk that sexy body down the beach and see if anyone catches your eye. If you’ve caught their eye, too, then find a reason to talk to them. It isn’t rocket science.”
“You come with me. I don’t know what to look for. I don’t know what to say. I was with Michelle since puberty. I’ve never even tried to flirt with someone. How am I going to suddenly go fishing for sex?”
“Take a breath. Finding a casual partner was your idea, and when I asked Naomi, she said this was her favorite way to find hookups before she met Natalie. She’d just look for a woman alone, one bag, one towel, one book, and just a little too put together to get in the water.”
“But, Naomi is like super-hot.”
“And so are you. That bikini is perfect.”
“Like you would know.”
“Hey, I’m gay, not blind. What can it hurt to just walk down and back one time? If there isn’t anyone that interests you, then we can go hang out with Jose while you drool over an Amy Adams movie…again.”
“That information was also coerced. I think me and Jose need to keep our distance for a while. Loose lips sink ships”
“Loose lips are probably what…”
“Stop right there. Don’t you finish whatever nasty shit you’re about to say.”
“I would go with you if I could, but I can’t. You wouldn’t look very single or very lesbian walking down the beach with a guy.”
“Nate, your nickname is ‘Big Gay Nate’. People can tell you’re gay from space.”
“Then they’ll think you brought your gay friend to keep guys away from you.”
“Ugh, alright. It was my idea, and I am struggling with this whole celibate lifestyle. Once down and back, and then I’m putting the coverup back on and we’re out of here.”
“Unless you don’t make it that far.”
“What would I even say? How do you start a conversation with someone that you want to end with sitting on their face?”
“Ask for help with something, or directions. I’ve got it. Ask for directions to the concession stand.”
“There is no concession stand.”
“That’s why you can’t find it.”
“Okay, then ask her to take a picture or about her book or where she got her swimsuit. Just start talking, your body will do a lot of the heavy lifting for you.”
“I still feel ridiculous parading myself around like this.”
“It’s hard to catch fish without bait. Not everyone finds 15-year relationships without looking like you did.”
“Honey, I’m 30 years old, I’ve never made it one year.”
“Sure, but you’re a slut.”
“My sex life is not the issue we are here to remedy.”
“I know. I’m just intimidated by the whole thing.”
“I understand, but your vibrators are going to start a union if you make them work any more hours.”
“Very funny. Alright. Here I go.”
Stephanie felt unsteady, like she didn’t know how she was supposed to walk. The sand was hot, and she was barefoot, so she moved down where the sand was wet. The beach was fairly narrow which meant that she could still see everyone from the water’s edge. Unfortunately, in her mind, that also meant everyone could see her. She was, after all, between them and the ocean they came to see, but after a few minutes, she didn’t feel like she stuck out much.
There was plenty of flesh showing on a warm sunny day. Plenty of carefully chosen bikinis and shirtless men sucking in their guts, but she still saw the eyes on her. Mostly it was the male gaze that seemed to follow her everywhere, but this day it was paired with many disapproving female faces as well. Not exactly what she had hoped for when she drunk shopped for a “woman-catching” bikini.
Some of the disapproving looks were probably from a level of jealousy, but she felt like more of them were for drawing their men’s eyes. Stephanie was not vain or self-centered, but she was perfectly bahis firmaları aware that most people considered her attractive, or more often “hot”, whatever that meant. She wished she could tell these women that the lingering gaze of their husbands was one of her least favorite things in the world, but she didn’t really know if that would make the ladies feel better or worse. “Dogs”, she said to no one, shaking her head.
Stephanie was no coward. She would finish the scan of the beach that she had agreed to, but she felt just plain silly. She was on display, mostly nude, fishing for a woman, and…
she spotted one.
Most of the way up the beach, under the protective shade of an umbrella, was a pale skinned curvaceous redhead in a black two-piece. She was alone. She was on the only towel near her, her hair was gently curled like she had done it with a flat iron (not swimming today), and she had one large beach bag next to her. Propped up on her left elbow reading, her hips were so highlighted and enticing that Stephanie didn’t realize she was staring at them. Until, she realized the redheaded woman was looking back at her.
Stephanie panicked and looked straight ahead, picking up the pace. She was 90% sure that she was actually licking her lips when she was caught staring at the way those full pale thighs rose up to the seam of the black bottoms. A seam that then formed a triangle pointing like an arrow between her legs.
“What the hell am I doing?” She began an animated conversation with herself, talking with her hands like some stunningly beautiful lunatic. “This won’t work. I can’t just go pick a girl up on a whim. Maybe this worked for Naomi, but I’m just getting sneers from most of these women. Oh, and plenty of dicks pointed my way. I could skip the ocean and swim in a sea of dicks if I wanted. Lucky me. Well, at least I’ve hit the end so I can go back and tell Nate I won the bet and he owes me dinner.”
When Stephanie turned around, she stopped dead in her tracks. She had caught the redhead watching her. She must have been at least fifty yards away, but she was sitting up with her book closed in her lap with her neck craned high staring right at Stephanie. After she had been caught, the redhead was playing it off, staring down at her book which had probably been opened to an arbitrary page. Stunned, Stephanie seemed rooted to her spot trying to figure out if this silly idea had actually born fruit. The woman checked out of the corner of her eye to see if she had indeed been caught watching Stephanie stroll down the beach. When it was confirmed, she closed the book, made distant eye contact, and gave a small wave with an “oh well” smile.
Stephanie’s feet began drifting her toward the alluring woman. They had both been caught leering at each other. There was no point in trying to hide her direction of travel. She marched straight at her, wondering why a redhead who needs to hide from the sun came to the beach at all. It seemed a silly thing to do unless, she hoped, she came here for the same reason Stephanie did.
The other woman stayed put on her towel and kept a welcoming smile on her face while Stephanie approached. Once she arrived, Stephanie realized she had forgotten to come up with some contrivance to begin a conversation. In a panic, she just said, “Uhm, nice umbrella.”
The woman snickered. It was perhaps the most poorly conceived pick-up line she had ever heard, but it was so adorable that it may have also been the best. “Thank you, would you like to have a seat with me?”
“I would, thank you.”
“My name’s Emma. I’m sorry if I was staring, but you look incredible in that bathing suit.”
“It’s okay. I mean it’s more than okay. I was glad.”
“Really? Glad is good.”
“Besides, I’m pretty sure you caught me staring first.”
“I’m pretty sure I did, too.”
“What are you reading? Oh, and I’m Stephanie by the way. Steph if you’d like.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Steph. It’s The Stand by Stephen King. Have you read it?”
“No, but I’ve seen the movie or miniseries, whatever it was. Do you always come to crowded places to read about the end of civilization?”
“No. He’s just my favorite author, and this was next on my list.”
“Oh, well, I read Tommyknockers when I was in High School, but to be honest, I didn’t really care for it that much.”
The conversation was surprisingly comfortable, and several subjects were lightly touched upon. Emma was magnetic. Her eyes were neither green nor brown but somehow both at the same time, and they shined. They shined like Emma had a light on inside of her, and every time they landed on Stephanie’s eyes the magnetism increased to the point that Stephanie felt a physical pull towards Emma. Eventually, Stephanie resolved to ask a question that actually meant something:
“Emma, are you here with anyone?”
“I am. Are you?”
“Actually, yes, but just a friend that won’t be missing me yet. Who are you here with?”
“Do you mind if I ask you a question before I answer?”
“Go kaçak iddaa ahead.”
“Why are you here today…in that bikini?”
“Well, it’s not my proudest decision, but me and my friend Nate got drunk last weekend and decided that I should order this bikini to help me get laid. I don’t know why I just told you that.”
“I find it hard to believe that is a problem for you.”
“It’s just…I was in one relationship for most of my life. I don’t really know how to navigate casual sex.”
“Is that what you’re after?”
“I think it’s all I’m ready for. I hope that doesn’t ruin whatever is happening here. Emma, I am really enjoying talking to you.”
“I’m enjoying it at least as much as you. Do you still want to know who I’m here with?”
“I’m worried it is bad news.”
“I’m here with my two kids and my husband.”
Stephanie felt a bomb go off inside her, tossing her emotions into disarray. She felt she should have known it had been too easy, it was going too well, and of course, it was for a man. Despite Emma’s protests, Stephanie started to get up but then she sat back down because she felt she owed Emma some explanation. So, she leaned in to speak quietly, “I’m sorry. This was a misunderstanding. I’m not bisexual, I don’t want to have a threesome with your husband or put on a show for him while he jerks off in the corner. I don’t think we’re looking for the same thing.”
Emma put her hands out pleading, “Hold on, hold on. It’s not like that.”
“Is this when you tell me you’re getting a divorce. I’m not here for drama either.” Stephanie started to get up again.
“No, I really think we’re looking for the same thing. Let me explain.”
Stephanie rolled her eyes, but plopped back down on the sand, feeling more ridiculous and on display than ever. Emma continued, “I didn’t realize I was bisexual until about two years ago. I’ve been with Jason for nearly 20 years, since we were in High School. When I came out to him, he told me I’m free to be with any woman I like as long as there are no men anywhere in the picture. It’s not about him, and he doesn’t want a threesome. It’s about me being with you. You said you didn’t want a relationship and neither do I.”
“He doesn’t get involved at all? Like, not even meeting me before I sleep with his wife?”
“He trusts me to make my own decisions, and it’s got very little to do with him. Look down there. See the guy keeping two kids busy by the water because his wife is talking to a gorgeous woman in a skimpy bikini. He supports me in everything I need and want. At the moment, I’m thinking you might be both.”
“So, do you do this a lot?”
Emma laughed. “No. I’ve only been with two women. My first became a regular thing for about a year. Then she moved away. We still talk but haven’t seen each other since then. The other just propositioned me in a bar one night, and I texted my husband that I was leaving with her. I haven’t touched a woman in the over six months since. I would like to change that.”
“Wow, Emma, this is kind of a lot, but…you’re right…it does also sound sorta perfect. He really doesn’t mind? No jealousy?”
“He loves it. I tell him the details later and we both get worked up. Me being with women has been the greatest thing to ever happen to our sex life. Once I finally let myself look at all the female bodies in this world, I started being turned on all the time. Maybe one in a hundred guys looks good enough to put thoughts in my head, but there are gorgeous women everywhere.”
“I can’t argue with that. I’ve never seen a guy that could turn me on. So…do you want my number? Or how do we start this?”
“Not to keep answering your questions with questions, but did you and your friend drive separately?”
“Yeah, we met here.”
“Can I see your car?”
“Oh my, yes, please…uh…I need my keys. Oh my god. I’ve never done anything like this.”
“It’s not a habit for me either, but I don’t want to leave without you. Lead the way.”
Emma pulled on a pair of jean shorts and a Janis Joplin cold shoulder t-shirt. Stephanie gave a shy, sideways glance toward Emma’s husband when she started walking. He was already heading up to the spot they were leaving, acknowledging a small parting wave from Emma with a smile. Stephanie was bouncing between surprise and elation during their walk across the beach. She was dreading the inevitable “I told you so” from Nate, but could see, as she got closer, that he was no longer where she had left him. After, a quick scan she found him down in the water laughing flirtatiously with some guy.
“Must be something in the air” Stephanie said smirking, “that’s my friend down there in the water trying to pick up the only guy here with a six-pack.”
“Do you need to tell him you’re leaving?”
“No. I don’t want to hear him gloat. He made the final decision on this swimsuit.”
Stephanie put her coverup back on and grabbed the small bag that only held her keys and a tube of sunscreen. Stephanie hadn’t even brought the kaçak bahis towel from her car. This trip wasn’t about swimming. It was about finding Emma, and she had done it. She supposed Nate was right. Her body had done the heavy lifting, turning Emma on simply by strolling by. It was truly the first time she had ever felt lucky to be attractive. Normally her body was something she tried to cover to avoid unwanted stares. Until that day, she had only maintained her body for the eyes of Michelle, her first and only lover.
As they approached the car, both women were nervous, but neither was considering changing course. Still, Stephanie profoundly and timidly said, “Only one person’s ever touched me.”
Emma looked right at her with those shining, infinite eyes, “Do you want me to touch you?”
“Do you live nearby?
Both women climbed into Stephanie’s car. It was blazing hot inside. They eagerly waited for the a/c to kick on, but when it did, there was little relief. It would take more than a blast of cold air to put out the fires that were causing their skin to flush and perspire. Emma was not accustomed to being the more aggressive person in a sexual encounter, but she could see two things that caused her to act. First, she could see that Stephanie was panicky and out of sorts. Second, she could see that Stephanie’s beach coverup had been pulled up past her hips while getting in the driver’s seat.
Her legs looked irresistibly inviting when they parted to work the pedals. Emma’s hand was on her thigh before she even backed out of the spot. By the time they got on the road, Emma was rubbing Stephanie through her bikini bottoms, applying a little extra pressure to her middle finger. Stephanie had longed for a woman’s touch every day and was in no mood for teasing. She took one hand off the wheel and pulled the waistband away from her body.
Emma’s hand slid in and the waistband snapped against her wrist. She curved her hand down between Steph’s legs. In response, Steph shifted in her seat and turned out her hips. Emma’s hand crested the lips and she gently moved her middle finger side to side until it lay between them, drowning in arousal. She slid the finger upward bending like an inchworm doing the moonwalk until she felt an unmistakable hood.
“Mmmm”, was all Stephanie had to say about the matter.
Emma moved her finger above it, not ready to expose Steph’s clit yet, and lovingly pet it with the pad of her finger. Stephanie was breathing audibly and twisting her shoulders. At the first red light, she grabbed Emma and kissed her. Emma’s hand went still as her tongue got busy. The two women kissed passionately, mouths opening and closing without breaking the seal of their lips. The car behind them honked and the pair turned their heads to look up at a row of green lights.
As the car took off, Emma took her hand out of Stephanie’s lap and asked, “How close is ‘very’ close.”
“Just past the next light.”
The light ahead was already changing to yellow. The two women held their bodies, waiting, as ready as runners at the starting block, for the car to stop again. Their faces collided with eager force. Steph’s right hand was in Emma’s hair and Emma’s right hand was on Steph’s bare stomach under her beach shirt inching upward toward her chest.
They separated after spotting the light change on their own. Stephanie’s nerves returned as they waited to turn left on the other side of the intersection. Who was she bringing into her home? What happened after? For that matter, what happened during? How could she know what Emma liked or didn’t like? What if she was no good, and her only lover never told her?
Emma could almost see Stephanie’s mind spinning while she pulled into the parking lot outside her apartment building. When they parked, Emma put her hand on Steph’s arm, “We don’t have to go up. I can call a ride from right here and just leave you my number.”
“The only thing I’m sure of is that I want you to come up. I’m just a little scared, too.”
“How long did you say you were with your ex?”
“Huh? Oh, um 15 years. Well, almost 15.”
“I know what that’s like. I was only with Jason just as long. I was scared, too. We can slow down a little and ease into it if you want.”
“I don’t know what I want. Well, I know what I want, but it just seems so real all the sudden.”
The kiss was a little softer, a little slower than before. Stephanie let her lips trail down past Emma’s jaw and onto her neck. The feel of another person’s skin and being wrapped up in another person’s body had been too long absent from her life. Even uncomfortably leaning across the armrests, Stephanie felt her tensions melt away the way they did when she slid into a bathtub. She kissed Emma’s freckled shoulder, exposed by her cold-shoulder tee, then looked into the brilliant shine of her eyes. “Let’s go.”
Stephanie’s apartment was not at all what Emma had expected. It was nice enough and it was tidy, but it was also kind of bare and sad looking. As they walked into her kitchen it reminded her of an apartment a divorced dad might move into in a movie. It made Emma wonder about the circumstances around the end of Steph’s last relationship.
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